Relationships are important parts of our lives, but sometimes they can make us feel worried and insecure. This feeling is known as relationship anxiety, which can make us doubt our partners or feel insecure about the relationship.
For this, it is important to know what causes relationship anxiety and how to deal with it so that it does not hinder your healthy relationships. Let’s get into what relationship anxiety looks like, why it happens, and practical ways to overcome it.
What is Relationship Anxiety?
Relationship anxiety is constant worry and fear within a romantic relationship, which includes feeling insecure, having doubts about the partner's feelings, and being afraid of rejection. Its symptoms may involve seeking constant reassurance, avoiding intimacy, and having intrusive thoughts about situations.
This feeling can stem from past experiences, societal pressures, and personal insecurities. Managing love anxiety involves open communication, seeking therapy, practicing self-care, and building trust with the partner. You can achieve this with the help of a therapist, who can help you strengthen the bond with your partner and push you to look at your relationship from an objective perspective.
Is Relationship Anxiety Normal?
Yes, to some extent, relationship anxiety is common and normal in romantic relationships. Many people experience moments of worry, doubt, or fear about their relationships at various points, which can vary greatly from person to person.
It is normal for anyone to feel nervous or uncertain about aspects of their relationship, such as commitment, trust, or compatibility, due to past experiences, fear of rejection or abandonment, or concerns about the future.
However, if you find yourself feeling anxious all the time, not trusting your partner, or constantly scared of being rejected, it could be a sign that it is not normal anymore. That's when it's important to take a step back and think about getting some help, like talking to a therapist, friends, or family, to understand why you are feeling this way.
7 Signs of Relationship Anxiety
Having relationship anxiety does not mean you are in a toxic relationship. Sometimes, we get this feeling because we do not want things to end, or maybe we are a bit scared because of past relationship issues.
Here are 7 common relationship anxiety symptoms:
- Constant worry about the stability of the relationship
- Excessive need for reassurance from the partner
- Fear of being alone or losing the relationship
- Intrusive thoughts about potential problems or conflicts
- Avoidance of intimacy or emotional closeness
- Difficulty trusting the partner
- High sensitivity to sensed signs of trouble in the relationship
These signs can be worked through with professional experts and with open communication with your partner. It might take some time but with persistence and constant work, you will be able to get rid of this anxiety.
What Causes Relationship Anxiety?
Do you wonder why my relationship gives me anxiety? Relationship anxiety can stem from various factors, both internal and external. When you understand the origins of relationship anxiety, you can understand your emotional responses and work towards a healthier and more secure connection. So, here are some common causes:
- Past experiences of rejection, abandonment, or trauma in relationships
- Insecure attachment styles, such as anxious-preoccupied or fearful-avoidant attachment
- Low self-esteem and negative beliefs about oneself
- Poor communication patterns and unresolved conflicts in the relationship
- Unrealistic expectations about relationships based on societal norms or past experiences
- Difficulty trusting the partner due to past betrayals or insecurity
- External stressors such as work pressure, financial difficulties, or family issues
- Uncertainty about the future of the relationship or long-term compatibility
- Comparisons with other relationships or societal ideals
It's important to note that there can be more causes of relationship anxiety than are listed here. If you find yourself experiencing anxiety in a relationship and you wish to improve it, consider seeking therapy, talking to family or friends, spending time with yourself, and doing things that help you see your anxiety from a surface level perspective.
10 Ways to Deal With Anxiety in a Relationship
It's understandable that dealing with anxiety within a relationship can seem difficult, as it requires understanding, communication, and self-care strategies. However, with continued love, care, and empathy, you can work on it and strengthen your bond with your partner. Here are 10 effective ways to address anxiety in a relationship:
1. Talk to your partner
Share your feelings openly with your partner. Discuss your anxieties, fears, and concerns to ensure that both of you are on the same page. Honest communication promotes understanding and connection.
2. Identify the root cause
Pay attention to situations or thoughts that tend to trigger your anxiety. Identifying these triggers is the first step in developing effective coping mechanisms and addressing the root cause of your anxiety in the relationship.
3. Practice self-care
Prioritize activities that contribute to your well-being. Regular exercise, mindfulness practices, sufficient sleep, and engaging in hobbies you enjoy can help reduce stress and improve your overall mental health.
4. Set boundaries
Establish clear and healthy boundaries to protect your mental and emotional space. Communicate your needs to your partner and work together to create a relationship environment that feels supportive and respectful.
5. Challenge negative thoughts
Actively challenge and reframe negative thought patterns. Cognitive-behavioral techniques can help you replace irrational or distorted thoughts with more balanced and realistic ones, reducing anxiety.
6. Practice mindfulness
Integrate mindfulness practices into your daily routine. Techniques such as meditation, deep breathing, and grounding exercises can help you stay present, manage stress, and alleviate anxiety symptoms.
7. Focus on the present
Avoid getting caught up in past relationship issues or worrying excessively about the future. Concentrate on the current moment and the positive aspects of your relationship, fostering gratitude and appreciation.
8. Build trust
Work on building and maintaining trust in your relationship. Open communication, transparency, and consistent actions help create a secure and trusting foundation, reducing anxiety related to uncertainty or fear of betrayal.
9. Give yourself love and care
It’s important to be kind to yourself as you handle your anxiety. Understand that managing anxiety is an ongoing process, and it's okay to seek support when needed. Ensure to cultivate self-compassion and patience throughout your journey.
10. Seek professional help
Consider consulting with a therapist or counselor who specializes in anxiety and relationships. Professional support provides you with tools, coping strategies, and a safe space to explore and address the underlying causes of your anxiety.
How Can Relationship Counseling Help?
Relationship counseling can provide valuable support and guidance for couples facing challenges in their relationship, including new relationship anxiety. Through counseling, couples have the opportunity to explore and understand the dynamics of their relationship in a safe and non-judgmental environment.
A skilled therapist can help couples improve communication, develop effective conflict resolution skills, and strengthen emotional intimacy. By identifying underlying issues and patterns of behavior, couples can gain insight into their relationship dynamics and learn how to deal with challenges more effectively.
How Can Now&Me Help?
If you are struggling with relationship anxiety, Now&Me is here to help you. Our platform offers free chats with qualified experts who specialize in issues of anxiety and relationships. Later on, if you're interested, you can choose to continue with paid chats, starting at Rs 30/-. Moreover, we even provide self-help resources like articles, guides, and forums to offer practical tips for coping with new relationship anxiety.
We also have a supportive community, where you can share your thoughts with people who are on the same journey as you to make you feel better. To heal your relationship, download the Now&Me app, and book a one-on-one consultation call anytime from anywhere.
Sources
The Relationship of Anxiety and Stress with Working Memory Performance in a Large Non-Depressed Sample. Frontiers in Psychology. https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2019.00004/full
Anxiety Disorders. The Cleveland Clinic. 2021. https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/9536-anxiety-disorders
Now&Me articles are written by experienced mental health contributors and are purely based on scientific research and evidence-based practices, which are thoroughly reviewed by experts, including therapists and psychologists with various specialties, to ensure accuracy and alignment with current industry standards.
However, it is important to note that the information provided is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Individual circumstances vary, and it is advisable to consult with a qualified mental health professional for personalized advice and guidance.
FAQs
Relationship anxiety can stem from past experiences, attachment styles, low self-esteem, communication issues, and fear of rejection or abandonment.
Anxiety in relationships can affect your partner by causing stress, strain on communication, feelings of inadequacy, and difficulty understanding your needs.
Yes, it's important to communicate openly with your partner about your relationship anxiety to foster understanding, support, and collaborative problem-solving.
To deal with anxiety in a relationship, practice open communication, challenge negative thought patterns, set healthy boundaries, prioritize self-care, seek therapy if needed, and work on building trust and security with your partner.