I am not able to propose my girl..as we r old friends...i need confidence 

Problem is ...due to study purpose we r in a long distance...its not possible right now to meet her...and i am not 100% sure about confessing it in call or whatsapp 

First try to find how she feels about you..

If she is your childhood friend then just go and tell her about your feelings. Even if she doesn't have the same feelings for you, it will not affect your friendship. Trust me and just say it on a  good going day and who knows maybe she feels the same way about you 😊

Love

My anxiety took away the best in me. Now all I'm left with is this hollow life with no sense of clarity. I fell so bad in life, be it career, love or health. I have none of it to be proud of. 

Anxiety

i would really like some hugs right now ^^ ...

Memories

Guys like theres a guy in my class , i often find him looking at me,once he was looking at me and i caught him he suddenly changed his Direction then. Once he even asked me for a pen,i know borrowing a pen doesn't necessarily mean they have crush on u but still :) if he had crush on me he would have dmed me on Instagram but he didn't:) yall think he has a crush on me or not?

Crush

How to take a break here?Not finding any such option but have seen for few people that they are taking break. Can anyone tell me?

3am Thoughts

I just wanted to again talk about the girl I felt in love with cuz I just want to yell it to the world but I can't really. 
She made me realize that this world isn't as horrible as I thought Her welcoming smile and kind words made me realize there's still so much good left in the world. She helped me regain my trust in people even when all hopes were lost, she helped me open up my heart that i had locked away not letting anyone in because I was too afraid. She helped me overcome my biggest fear, people. Bc she was also one of them but I could approach her without being afraid. I knew her smile was genuine, I knew she wouldn't be mean. Because of her i grew so much and became a better person. That's one of the thousand signs that proofed to me that I was in love and that real love exist. Cause it brought the best of me and that's what real love does to you. Feelings such as egoism and jealousy/envy disappear when I'm arround her. Because for her I would do anything, and as long as she's happy there's no space for jealousy. If her and I aren't meant to be and if she decides to be with someone else so happily ill never be upset because her happiness is my happiness, it really is, and even if that happiness didn't include me I would still be okay with it. My love for her has grown so deep that as long as she's okay and I can be next to her in any type of way that's okay. Because of her existence alone is that in happy, I always call her my angel because she's such a good person so caring, kind, thoughtful, always there when you need her, so unique and extremely beautiful because in her eyes and her entire self shines the beauty of her soul. She also came to me at the perfect time, just like an angel. She came when I cried everyday and every night praying for someone to come into my life, to be there and bring me happiness. And then I discovered that happiness I was looking for in her. I can't stop thinking of her, dreaming of her,and admiring how great of a human being she is. I could go on and on talking about her. I love her so much, God bless her heart, I hope she can be happy, because she deserves it. I wish she knew how spacial she is. I bet she doesn't think there's someone out there who admires her the way I do. But there is, I'm here. And just like that, I'm sure other people would agree that she's so perfect the way she is. And of course we all have flaws, but despite that I love her, I love her flaws her smiles, and although I hate when she cries I love her tears because those scars of hers are so precious, it makes her stronger, it made her into the person she is today. And she's so worth it.

Was this too much lol. I'm sorry Im just really in love and so glad I can say that tonight we are both laying under the same stars, and that in a world of such big dimension and years of existence  we met. True love does exist even if it isn't reciprocated. If it makes you the happiest you've ever been and they're good to you then This love is definitely true. I could go on and on about why this is so special. But you'll know once you feel it. Also know that true love isn't only find in a person. Maybe in this life you don't have a "the one" as in a person. But I believe you can find your true love, in something that will bring you so much joy you won't belive how beautiful this world actually is. I hope you find that light for you. Hang in there and be hopeful there's something good waiting for you out there. Happiness is never late to come as long as you're still breathing. When you feel it you'll know. And no it won't last forever, but it will for sure be memorable. It will change you as a person into something you'll be much happier with.

I miss my Erasmus time too much 😔

Jealous

1:28 AM

If yr parents ever did something bad to you. Like something that is so fucked up. Especially as you grew older and then you realise that what they did to you is fucked up. Then you have every right to be angry and hate them.
but somehow i think its okay to try to make peace again with them cs maybe they are also tried their best as a parents :)

Im just saying, for myself too and dont let it affect you that much to be ruining yr own life okay 👌🏼

Family

This might be a long passage and I'm not sure that is what this platform is exactly for. 
I'm feeling lost and sad tonight. There are so many things going on inside my head. 
1. I had an uncomfortable argument with a new friend who I met three months ago. We became really close in those first months, we shared things that neither of us had told anyone else, we planned to travel around the world together and I think I really appreciate and love her (platonically). But, since this argument, we haven't talked for a week which has left me feeling very lonely and anxious. I'm not worried about not talking ever again, I know we will. We go to the same university and our friendship is already so strong (I think) that, it just wouldn't happen. We're both on summer vacation right now, so no excuse to see each other.
What's disturbing me most is that this past month we've really been arguing and not getting along. We both get frustrated at each other so easily and we're both really sensitive people which doesn't help at all. So talking became really difficult. Neither of us could really say anything without starting an argument, and now there is this looming tension between us that makes me really sad. Thinking over those first two months when we were inseparable, crying over how happy both of us were to have met each other, laying in the sun together talking and laughing about the silliest of things. I've been thinking it's like the honeymoon period of a relationship, although of course platonically. I'm hoping it's just a glitch in our close bond and our friendship will go back to how it was before these past few weeks, but it is definitely making me feel sick to the stomach and lonely.

2. Tonight, I met up with my high school friends who I haven't seen in a few months. One of the people in the group, I used to be really close with, but they've changed a lot. And tonight they talked of all these things everyone has done since I saw them last. Although maybe typical teenage things, I hadn't done them and it made me feel so small. I feel silly even writing this, I don't even know why this has made me so sad because I personally don't want to do the things they talk about (drugs etc). Maybe I feel like I'm missing out on something. I just feel so so tiny after being with them, this one friend in particular dumps all of this stuff on me, how they're so happy and doing so many new things with so many friends. They never ask about me or when they do they never really, listen, something I really value. But they're not toxic either, they're not a "bad" friend and I'm sure they have no idea I feel like this. I feel so drained, even thinking about all the experiences I might be missing out on. Being around these people unfortunately makes me feel really lonely.

I am lonely. I crave intimacy, warm hugs, and someone who adores me as I do them. I am tired of trying so much and receiving so little. I don't think anyone could understand what I would do for someone to truly, wholly love me for who I am.

Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts