Today Iām not feeling great.
I should my daughter is finally getting better sheās had and illness for about a week the poor darling.
We have a house viewing, fingers crossed we get it.
I got a few hours sleep.
But Iām dredding my partner waking up and just seeing how the day plays out.
He admitted him self the night before but didnāt say nothing to me. So Iām sitting at my friendās house (who is beyond a saint to house me, my husband & two daughters the oldest being 19mnths) until we get a place of our own. He blew up because I broke a window so to him thatās more stress the cost to replace the window, it not being our house ect. Straight away he tells me to call my friend and let her know so I do that heās walking in and out saying shit about things and myself. And while Iām trying to let her know heās saying all that then goes our yea her answer not me. Like fuck bro you told me to call so thatās what Iām doing this goes on for about 3-4min then he asks if Iām okay mind you we on the second level and tbh if I didnāt correct the way I fell I would have went straight thru while holding our 1mnth old. So then decides heās going for a walk he needs to talk to someone. So im left sitting there after almost falling out a window, listening to his blow up I choose not to say nothing or even defend myself to save the hassle of an argument because it turns into me trying to start an argument or saying that heās wrong some shit like that. So yea after all that I think I need a breather too but no I gotta nurse my baby to sleep and comfort my sick asf daughter. He then goes for this walk and admits himself. This happend roughly 9:00- 9:30. 1hr passes Iām thinking he shouldnāt be to far he doesnāt know the area. Another hour passes I start to worry we both are quite fucked up in the head so I hope he hasnāt done nothing to himself. Also thereās a big storm passing thru. Thinking heās going to get sick, I hope heās okay. My daughter is just crying & crying I can only do so much Iām still trying to settle our baby but she canāt because our oldest is upset. I missed his parents calls but then when I finally got bub asleep and the other settled until the Dr showed up, I called them back they asked me whatās going on explained to them what had happened. I feel as if they blame me for their son having a melt down. Theyād use words like you guys this and Yous need to that. It sounded like you this and you that it really did so another thing to bring me down. Then I start calling police stations and hospitals to see if he is at either even left my unattended children to see if I can see him down the road or around the block. But nothing so now Iām starting to feel it all, to make things worse at one point the calls to the police stations werenāt being picked almost like they weāre denying the calls so that got me abit emotional because I canāt find him and I havenāt heard anything since he needed to go talk to someone. itās now 1:00-1:30 police station answered finally listens to me and not long after that I found him they had picked him up and taken him to the hospital so he can talk to someone. He then stayed there a few hrs and came back home. All while Iām doing everything to make our daughters comfortable and look for him and keeping his parents upto date. I then go straight to Iām sorry and just feel really guilty like if only I didnāt lose the thermometer, I shouldnāt have lent on the window ect. Then I start to bum out abit more because in that while time no one was checking to see if I was okay. Especially when he blew up I had to listen to 3-4min of BS before I was asked if Iām okay. But yea crying and hugging him letting him know itās okay and that Iām sorry. So the next day Iām just trying not to bite back even when he is says something along the lines of your not doing anything or why isnāt this done yet. Then after all day of basically being numb he has a issue with that. So Iām ment to be all happy and cheery after a day like today & last night. Then later on I have a tone and I spoke to him angerly because I was putting the baby down to sleep he wakes her. I love the man deeply heās my first love but he Carries on like heās only one going thru shit.
So year kind of not looking forward to today
Simran @st1199
Hey!
How are you feeling after what all happened matters the most? Did you sleep enough, did you eat properly?
I couldnāt understand the starting how a window glass broke and move to your friendsā house. I hope your children are fine and comfortable. You are a strong woman. Mark my words. Even after a fight you went looking for him and tried your best and finally met him. Because you have a heart and you love him and care about him. I am proud and your children too will be proud of you. š
Also, letās face the reality? If he isnāt treating you well you need to talk it out. He canāt do this his whole life and you will listen because you are his wife, right?
You need to take a strong stand, revoke his behavior, make him realize and he very well knows he canāt, and has no right. You are a human being too and you have your personal life to love despite Husband and children.