Out of all the characters in friends, i liked Chander the best. The guy had that same sarcastic humor as me. It was the one episode where phoebe dates a pychologist or something and he dismantles the toxic traits in everybody. Coming to Chandler, he points out that uses self deprecative humour to hide behind his lack of love from his parents and it was that moment that i was like, “Damn! I am Chandler!” We dont even realise how often we use self deprecatory language to make upfor our lack of confidence and self love. It used to fit in, to not seem threatening or topacify more dominant personality types. If Im already pathetic enough, they wont make fun of me right? It seems better to laugh with them. But, it is soo much more damaging than it seems. You are giving other people a free pass to walk all over you, degrde you and strip you off your importance. I have begun to consciously refrain from joking about myself in a negative way or to encourage others from doing so. Its a small step but its a leap to take back your assertiveness, your personal power.