It’s funny how my ex, who was my first (yeah ik, firsts are traumatizing/learning lessons etc etc) started victimizing herself for every little thing. She even thought, deep in my subconscious, i feel she will cheat on me, BECAUSE i had 2-3 dreams where she was some queen and i was a soldier and had to fight a quest and defeat the king to win her back. This is not even the worst. She started getting close with a friend of mine and called it a platonic relationship. balls. my whole batch could see what is going on and told me to stay away from her. Whenever i talked to her about this, she would start victimizing herself again and blame me for ‘accusing’ her. The most fucked up thing is that she fought with literally everyone and said that there is nothing between her and that dude, but clearly, they both ended fucking around all this while :)
now both of them have lost all their friend due to their behaviour.
The funniest of them all is that she started calling me Toxic and a psycho person and started spreading shit about me, where as all i did was tried to believe her when she said 'If you ever trusted me, I’m telling you me and him are just platonic friends."
Issa long story, so sorry i cant put myself through the PTSD(yes it feels like PTSD) by remembering and ranting all this out. Fucking hell i can write a short book on this shit😂
fuck bro
Sansthita @sansthita
How are you feeling today? You really had it rough
bro ill be honest, so all this has been happening since last December, to this June, when i finally graduated and left the city. The 3 months were absolutely pathetic, very frequent panic and anxiety attacks, trouble in sleeping etc, problems with family and post-college bullshit. But after months of being knee deep in this shit, i feel right now I’m in a better place when it comes to this whole issue. Like pehel there use to be times when anything remotely related to my college and the life there use to give my an attack and whole all mix of emotions, but now i can type all of this and narrate the whole incident with her without grasping on air or tearing up. So making some progress ig :')
Sansthita @sansthita
Yes you are making very good progress. Soon you will move on and feel nothing about this issue. Best of luck and it’s a woman this side. I am sorry someone of my gender hurt you so much. Love and hugs
thank you for your kind words :') all i can do it take a strong ass lesson from this about red flags and protecting my energies. This was much more than a first relationship for me, like after a shitty childhood, that too in various boys schools across the country, i finally had something that was too good to be true, idk, its all a mess, But yes, finally some progress, yay. One of my close friends told my ki healing is never linear, like you’ll have your BT days but it does get better with time
Sansthita @sansthita
Yes finally everything does fall into place. Healing is the best thing that can happen to u. Keep your chin up fighter! You are almost there
Yooo! I’m glad you have somehow ended the situation. You know i don’t wanna say the same stuff but yet you deserve something so good and ig it’s on your way… do good and learn from your mistakes… have a great life <3
