I tend to remain happy and calm all the time.Do my work passionately and sincerely,behave decently at public places. But at home,especially when my father tries to put any decision on me,I get pissed off.Really really pissed off.When an argument gets heated between us,he acts like a stranger to me and drags my mother in between as if she is responsible for my arguing.
I really hate my father.
I used to have problems with my parents when I was living with them. My parents are divorced so I had these problems with my mom and dad in separate occasions. I live alone now and all those issues are resolved. Having some time to be apart can really help.
I understand it might not be that easy to just find a new place to live, but maybe you have some other family that you could live with for a few days. Just to sort this thing out, if you think it could help and you explain the situation I think everyone will understand.
Hi. Just by skimming through what you have put across, I can kind of relate because : 1) Seems like a toxic household with unhealthy family boundaries 2) Your own unresolved childhood issues with either or both of your parents that triggger that deep rage or anger you feel was overlooked during childhood. You issues with your father likely never got resolved so whenever you interact with him, you act out from the frequency of that hurt child by lashing out. If you can, move out and live by yourself for a while so you can get a sense of who you are, not what you had to become. If not, please start healing you inner child. I would highly recommend the holistic psychologist on instagram and youtube but you can find a tonne of other people that you prefer as well. And dont worry, this acknowlegement is the first step in healing yourself.
Simran Patel @simranpatel
There’s just too much of a communication gap! the only way forward is to figure out a way to peacefully coexist with your father.