I have such conflicting feelings about my partner.
I am sick of myself.
It’s like I can’t even cry about it because my tears won’t come out. I am just angry and angry inside. But like I love him I think. Because why the fuck do I put up with his games? Why am I not looking for someone else? Why don’t I just fucking do something about it? I’m getting older and I feel like my life is just wasting away me trying to see if I can live another day with him and then incase two days are decent and i start building my life again with him and then again shit happens and u question my fkn existence. And like who the fcuk even am i? The one he says I am or the one I feel in my fkn gut. I don’t trust anything but I don’t trust him either. I neither trust myself nor anyone else (family) in my life. I am so conflicted and death doesn’t come to me so I won’t have to make a choice and life could just take me away no matter what the reason. Whether I was an asshole or I could be decisive, or i was too overbearing or i was just a kind soul who couldn’t cope with the fkn life I have. Idk whatever idk really. I just want something to stay something to make sense some consistency and reality. But then fcuk i can’t just leave him, i don’t want to give up on him… i want it to work (even though I know the harsh truth it never will) and it feels so much like I fucking failed life because I couldn’t recieve love and the ones that gave me real love i maybe never noticed them … Idk I’m just going to leave it at this and reframe my thoughts and wipe the few tears that came up writing this.
Thank you for reading, I’d love some solutions or questions idk to help me figure this out.
Reyad Soliman @reyad
You didn’t want a solution you need to talk to some one feel angry is not make any thing better and the one who love you you will see them don’t worry you have to talk to him and share this feeling with him it is overload on your self calm down nothing need your stress 😬 life is easy go out have fun together make memories together and talk ☺️ we all her for your help and we always support good luck 😃
Thanks a lot
Reyad Soliman @reyad
Thank for what it may work 😌 to make people happy 😁
Anil @aniljulipala
I know it’s so frustrating to know that you can’t get some meaning out of your relationship, but that’s how it is with people, sometimes there will be a time where you feel like both of you are drawn apart or feel like fighting over silly things or may be he is playing games, it’s something that you have to figure out for yourself, but remember this life doesn’t always be like this, it will change… like they say (change is inevitable) even it is good or bad, in the end everything will lead to something beautiful. Just take a moment to think on who you are and what you want in life. Whether you want that person to be in your life or not? Talk to him clearly what you’re going through, may be then you’ll get some clarity on what you should do next.
Cheers 🍻
Thanks a lot.
Anil @aniljulipala
If you still feel like talking there are people in here, who can listen… but try n talk with you boyfriend first… see where it takes
