I have lost my father, and with him lost the motivation to study .Sometimes this thought comes in mind like “why should i study,when he is not there to cheer me up” ?
I’m so sorry to hear about your loss. When I was in school, one of my classmates lost her father too, when we were very young. I don’t know how she coped or managed to get back to being the brilliant student that she was, but she somehow managed. We never spoke about it, because I never wanted to bring it up. All I can say is, that the hurt, the sheer hopelessness of everything around you is very real. And it will take time. This is a big absence. So, allow yourself to grieve. It won’t be easy. For quite some time. There will be things you do that will invoke memories. But live in his memory. Live how he would have liked you to live. Achieve for him. Find yourself in the process. Just keep him as a north star, as a guiding light in your life. I know this is easier to say, and you are perhaps not even in this headspace right now to be practising any form of self-care. Just know that it gets better. Nothing will fill the absence, but you will learn how to move on with your life. And right now, I can understand that that might seem like a bad, scary, selfish thought. But don’t feel the guilt of anything. Just give yourself the time, space and energy you need to heal from this. It might not be easy, but it is not impossible. Let the healing, grieving process be a spiritual one and not one that drains you. Take care, my deepest condolences xx