I have arrived at the conclusion that my self-esteem is mostly dependent on how well I do in academics. Am I sad and disappointed? Fuck yea, this is majorly stupid. I have no other talents and all I can do is rely on my stupid academic performance to define my worth and I fucking hate it.
I always find refuge in sayings that grades don’t define a person, but it’s embedded in my fucking head that IT DOES. I acknowledge that it doesn’t, but I live out my life like it’s everything.
I’m gonna go back now to bitch at my school works.
So congrats you know exactly what’s wrong. It is ok if you cannot change its once. Our brain is so structured certain brain pathways are already formed by your years of thinking the wrong way it will not change in a day or month. Keep working and reminding self there is more to life than academics. It will take some time for new neuron pathways to be formed in brain.Love .Best Wishes.
