I feel so terrible right now. The only people I ever wanted to love me were my parents. They have always made me feel unwanted. My parents try to use me for everything and speak badly about me to people. I am older and choose now not to have them in my life after I found out they are the ones tarnishing my name. My dad was very abusive growing up. We tried leaving multiple times but my mom would always go back. Noone ever believed me about abuse. I ended up in multiple abusive relationships thinking its all my fault. I just feel so hurt inside and I have a lot of trauma that just doesnβt seem to heal. I feel like I canβt breath anymore. I feel like no matter how hard I try I just get judged by the world.