I canβt really decideβ¦
I just had my first MUN last month. It was definitely not the best experience (it was horrid) but I knew that I shouldnβt completely give it up, βfirst MUNs donβt go really wellβ, or at least as planned. I knew that I shouldnβt judge my βMUNing skillsβ based on my very FIRST MUN. Even though, other delegates in my committee were just too good, extremely hard to beat and very contentious, I excused myself claiming they had more experience and were not as lost as I am. I took it easy on myself. But when my ~8th grader friends~ won recognitions, I didnβt feel too good. Their first MUN went really well (maybe not really well, but pretty wellβ¦) Now, I started to question my MUNing abilities. βItβs just not my thing!β I said to myself, but then again, it WAS my first MUN, everyone takes their time, I guess. Now if this wasnβt already a problem, another inter-school MUN opportunity came my way (of course), which is obviously great as Iβll get more experience and can get better at it. But then, I started recalling my first MUN and how stressed out I was before, just going on researching, only to find out that it wasnβt enough. When I think about the βprestigious, elite MUN Clubβ and how badly I want to be a part of it, I feel like giving it a go, whatβs the worse that could POSSIBLY happen, but then I feel like giving myself a break, it was too much to handle for someone like me. Then I start remembering the slight fun that I had during the conference and what all I learnt from my first experience, but it isnβt easy to speak up in front of so many wayyyy more experienced and confident delegates. Sometimes, I feel like I should just go for it, it WILL be a great experience after all (I mean they do have a βsocials and DJ sessionβ) but then I think of all the other reasons why I shouldnβt go and restrict myself. I watched Priyanka Chopraβs Youtube Original, βIf I Could Tell You Just One Thingβ for the second time, recently. She even interviewed Simone Biles, and when she asked her the βone thingβ she would like to say to her and everyone watching, she said, βRisk-taking. Do something that terrifies you, everyday. It makes you realise your value and who you are as a personβ That made me think differently, maybe I should do what intimidates me. Even though Iβm still not completely sure about doing this MUN, I do feel encouraged and hope that I can come to a conclusionβ¦