I cant do it anymore
Fomo is going to kill me
Idk why god does not want me to enjoy
All hard things are for me 
Why meeee alwaysssss???
Why meee???

Exhausted

Overwhelmed with whatever is happening around

COVID-19

I feel like everything is slipping from my hands. Time, people, situation, relations and what not. I don't feel connected to anyone at a times and I try hard to fit in sometimes (I feel). 

I also feel un-loved at a times. Unseen for most of the times (I could be wrong, but then I feel it sometimes. And since the last few days, I just can't ignore it). 

I have these constant thoughts, Will my friends and family (except my parents) will ever cry when I die?  What if I suddenly die and I didn't get the chance to talk to people I wanted to. What if I suddenly die and I didn't get the chance to mend broken relations.

If I go missing someday, will people even notice it? 
There are so many if's in my mind and so many scenarios, which isn't leaving me and I feel that in some or the other way it's affecting me, my mental and emotional stability and my relationships with the people around me.

Sometimes, I honestly don't feel like living. 

Insecurity

I'm thinking of Ending things.....🥱🥱🥱

3am Thoughts

Hey . I have recently been wrapping my head about law of attraction and quite a few times the things I wanted came to me . Now thinking about it there is a dream college I want acceptance to and I have been practising around it but at the same time somehow i feel this constant threats acid attack or any bad attacks . I fear that thinking about it too much I will manifest it and I tell myself it's not gonna happen but at the same time I ask myself what about your dream college then.these are the constant thoughts I have. Can someone explain it.

Mental Wellbeing

I need help like actually , I don't know what is wrong with me but there is something wrong and I am suffering a lot. I was so good at a kid and then teenage hit me and everything changed I started going after boys to find love, started neglecting my studies and got my heart broken and lost all self worth and love but still somehow aced till my 12 th class. I lost my dad when I was 15 , since then my mom, bro and I struggle but I'm such a mess I don't have energy to help her. I'm 20 now I wasted 2 years of my college studying nothing, now when people are apply for internships , I don't know how to pass the basic test of those. My chest is hurting. I don't know how to help myself. I feel so helpless

Depression

Feeling down , I hate OCD it’s the worst 

Hello to anyone who is reading this. 
I am not a social person but as humans we crave to belong. So here is my attempt to find people like me? 
I have never really shared this experience with a lot of people and havnt met people who have been thought this experience.
That was a long introduction. But to get to the point.... My mother killed herself. Has anyone been through something similar? I'd really wanna know how you are doing?

Family

Depression is a mental illness that fucks with your mind, that becomes friends with your thoughts and slowly manipulates them...it tricks your mind especially the way you see yourself. It consumes you from the inside that slowly appears to show from the outside, it makes you exhausted...dull. 
Then you slowly start to feel anxious and your self-esteem starts to disappear, you feel self-conscious about your surroundings like itś the first time you´ve seen them. You feel like you can´t breathe like you are gasping for air, you start to realize that not only you have depression but the anxiety decides to introduce itself.
You are locked inside your house scared and anxious to leave, but relaxed and safe inside. But as time passes by you forget about the safeness and relaxation you felt..like it was never there, you feel stressed and pressured from what has become today.
When you forcefully take yourself out or your family takes you with them to buy the groceries, you feel everyone's eyes on you, you want to run and get as far as possible but can´t. The mask you wear makes you feel somewhat safe, but feel exposed at the same time.
One of the worst feelings is when you feel looked at while trying to gasp for air but have the mask on that doesn't let you, your mind goes black and can´t think of anything but the stupid manipulating voice in your head.
I feel overwhelmed and scared...
 

Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts