Hi this is going to be quite long. I am seriously debating whether or not these next few days will be my last on this Earth. I have been dealing with depersonalization, anorexia, depression, and anxiety for many years now. I am also a lesbian living under a roof with a half homophobic family. My mother berates and screams at me every day for my failures. Yet she still manages to make me feel bad for her every day, that it’s my fault she’s always unhappy. Today, I was screamed at that I am a “nutcase bitch” and that i will amount to nothing. I was even made fun of for shaking on my bathroom floor sobbing. I also have dealt with self harm in the sense that I hit myself until i have large bruises. I have tried a couple times to commit suicide, one almost successful. I don’t see the point in waking up anymore if i’m just waiting for it to end. Nobody will care if i’m gone, nobody will ever love my disgusting selfish self. thank you to whoever
Nora @nora
Hello,
based on what u wrote I have to say that u’ve suffered a lot and still do. But I can understand you in some kind of way. Life can be very, very, very hard, even for a long period of time. But please listen to me: There IS hope, even if ur brain tells u there isn’t.
You have to leave this toxic environment and take a break. Maybe seeing a therapist will be a good start.
Remember that I AM HERE for you and will always care. You can always express your feelings and thoughts through this website and solutions will be found. There are a lot of helpful people here who really care and try to help.
You can even contact me via Twitter, Instagram or whatever if u want to.
Please stay strong and overthink ur decisions and actions!
noooo, i’m so so so sorry love that we have all failed you. i’m so so so sorry, I don’t know if all the apologies in the world will ever be enough for me to convey how bad i feel for what you are going through, and have had to go through in the past. i don’t know if i can say anything that will help, but all i want you to know is that if you’re not loved right now, doesn’t mean you never will. i know it is a difficult time for you, but i want you to keep going on…to achieve all that you wish to…to grow in life, when you no longer have to be at home and within its confines. all i can tell you is that you have me, i don’t know you, but i want good for you. i want you to be able to get over this time in your life and have good things, happy things, pleasant things … all of which you deserve ❤️
