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Mental HealthThought


Hey this is related to someone from whom I’m having a hard time moving on. I started seeing this guy (call him Shark) 4 yrs back when i was already in a very long term relationship with someone else . Shark made me feel like everything is attainable and it was a nice feeling to have for a 16 yr old girl. Some time later i confessed to my boyfriend that I’m seeing another guy and we instantly broke up. I was devastated and didn’t know how to move past my guilt for cheating . Few months later i broke up with Shark to get back with my old boyfriend coz that seemed like the only solution for my guilt but that didn’t work out too. A year later i met shark again and i started feeling for him again. I literally threw myself and my heart to him so that he accept me but he didn’t coz he didn’t trust me anymore . He was a real gentleman all along and never in any way took advantage of me. After all the stalking he finally blocked me. It’s been 2 years and I’ve been in 2 relationships (one is ongoing) but i still get anxious when i hear shark’s name . Also apparently shark is a good friend of my current boyfriend. I’m afraid I’ll screw over this relationship which i don’t want to . I haven’t been in contact with shark for 2 yrs but it still makes me feel weird. I feel like i can never be loyal to anybody and nobody should trust me coz I’ll screw over. I don’t feel emotionally satisfied.

If you have any kind words that can help. Pls share.

3 replies

your not a bad person you just made a few mistakes when you were young like all of us. the weird obsession you have with him is because he’s the one that “got away” you never got to the serious part of a relationship with him only the honeymoon phase.
You need to undestand that you don’t like him anymore but only the nostalgia gives you those feelings so your getting confused.
don’t ruin your good relationship because of a what if and no cheating is a choice and yes you can be loyal if you want to. You may not be able to control your feeling but as long as you don’t act on them your a good person
again Your Not I Love with this guy only an image/idea of him.


I totally acknowledge the fact that I don’t have feelings for him and it’s all nostalgia. You have described my current situation pretty well. It just scares the hell out of me coz in my heart I don’t wanna hurt anybody in any way but my actions were quite contradictory. I’m working on this self doubt situation. Tysm for your kind words


I’m glad I could help, past mistakes have made you the wiser person you are today, so put more trust in yourself and enjoy life. You’re not that same 16 year old.


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