Yesterday was my final semester post graduation exam of macroeconomics and i’m gonna fail. 100% I’m gonna get a supply and what shocks me is that i don’t care and this upsets me a lot. There was time when i used to b so scared if i didn’t go well in exams. ‘WHAT IF I FAIL?’ ‘WHAT IF I GET LOW SCORES?’ but nowadays i simply don’t care. I know thr consequences of what might happen if i fail and still don’t care and this terrifies me. What’s wrong with me? How can be like this? Even if i want to do something, for the first few seconds i will be so motivated and determined and after that determination just go WHOOSH. I’m so lazy that i can’t describe my laziness in words. i don’t want to like this but whenever even if i pit a slight effort in changing myself,its asif the entire universe is against me. i wrote something likw this earlier on this site and a person said that i might have ADHD. Honestly , i was taken back. I was like its not true and i was quite offended. Maybe becouse i didn’t know anything about it. So i took a ADHD test which there on internet and guess according to it i have severe case of ADHD.I even looked up for the symptoms and i have literally have 9 out of the 10 symptoms. And the thing is that ADHD is not curable. i don’t even to what to say. I want to consult a doc but i tell my mom about this she will just say that i’m making excuses to cover my failures and laziness. I’m a good person, i know that and i wnat to live a good life nut nowadays it seems that i can’t do that. i’m never gonna get My Post Graduation certificate and i will wasting another year in order to write the supply. i’m 24 yers old and i don’t a dream or a aim in my life. What’s the point of even living when u r such a burden like me? if i’m like ,i don’t wanna live. I’m so digusted by myself. In my life i got chances after chances, opportunities after opportunities to prove myself,but i always ignore them and take them for granted. I’m quite fed up with myself. i have such a beautiful life and i’m ruining and completely destroying it with my own hands.
YOU ARE NOT A BURDEN. Read that again, say it out loud, shout it from the rooftops until you believe it because it’s true. You are not a burden. You are not disgusting. You are lost and struggling and that is OK. Just try to follow your heart, and say yes to fun things. Maybe you’ll find who you are meant to be then.
Hi, I hope you are doing fine.
I’m in the 5th sem of my 4-year course and am currently facing a lot of trouble and can relate to your post at some level. I literally missed a midsem exam (this was the first time ever that I missed an exam in my life) but didn’t feel much. I used to be amongst the good students during school time but now as an undergrad student, I didn’t care even about missing a major exam, and I feel really bad about that… how and when did I get this insensitive.
I should have had a summer internship by now but I didn’t have my projects ready… I know that I have the ability and talent but somehow I am just unable to get myself to work on it.
I think I too have ADHD (inattentive subtype), but again don’t have an easy access to a psychiatrist, not sure what to do…
