Wtf is up with my brain!

Okay I’m kinda the person who likes to keep my social groups seperate especially the ones that are family friends who I know since childhood and like my university/college friends. 


But now I have a few family friends coming to my university/college and it feels like from the convos that have been going around that they are keen to join my uni/college friend group 

Like I know I’m making a fuss out of it but I just like to keep them separated and for some reason I have anxiety and have been stressing over it 

Oh god I hope so 
I feel bad but I don’t really like to mix it up 

I really hope so :/ 
Thanks tho this helps 

Friends

Is it okay to have no friends?

I don't have friends,,, it's okay?

Exhausted

yesterday never in my life i felt so so so alone i could acutally went through my messenger found no one to vent my suffocated feelings ,there were plenty people on my list ,many have been venting their feelings their happening to me .it was me i couldnt do the same back to them but why? i dont trust them? or is it i dont want to show them this side of me ,weak ,fragile,emotionally unsatsisfied .they dont know this ,the real me on the other end of this cell phone :( 


Emotional Abuse

Over the past semester of college, I have bonded and become friends with people on my dance team. I felt like I have been talking more to them and present in the conversations. But they keep bringing up how I'm really quiet. I am kind of quiet, but like not how they are saying, and it's making me feel like I haven't actually become that close with them and that they don't really see me or as a friend, and it is making me really sad because this is the only friend group I've made and I like hanging out with them. 

(i just need to rant so no one has to reply) i feel so lonely. like i have no friends and it sucks. yea i have my family but i don’t talk to them a lot or really get into conversations with them. my friends i’ve had around my whole life i feel are drifting away and im trying so hard to keep the friendship alive but it seems like no effort is being put into it by them. i’ll send videos to our group chat, ask if they want to hangout on the weekend, and try to start conversations but literally no one replies. do you know how shitty that makes me feel? being ignored almost every time. i will never tell them how it makes me feel because they’ll try to make it seem like im the problem and that i text too much in the group chat and they’re doing stuff. they’ve all changed sm and it hurts me. i never really had a lot of friends because i have really bad social anxiety so the only real friends i ever had were them, my whole life. i don’t talk to anyone in school either. ik no one in my classes. i only talk to one friend from the group. also one friend from the group is known to bash people who have “no friends” and it makes me feel like shit. i just want to have people to hang out with and have fun with instead of sitting inside every single day drowning in my thoughts or on my phone for hours. it hurts seeing peoples story’s every weekend of them having fun and hanging out with friends when all i ever do on the weekend is sleep. i understand they might have stuff to do on the weekend but literally why ignore me? it makes no sense and it makes me feel like complete shit and hate myself because i feel as i talk too much. in reality i just want friendships. i hate this sm. and before anyone tells me to make new friends i literally cant, its so hard for me to even talk to new people better yet be comfortable around them. since i’ve known that group of friends my whole life its easy for me to be comfortable around them but now it feels like they just don’t care. im sick of never going out , im literally the most adventurous person like i love going out and exploring so how do you think it makes me feel to sit in my house everyday (besides going to school).

Social Anxiety

I feel so sad angry I don't know why but i gave my 100 percent to my friendships yet they turned out to be snakes
They keep hanging out without me and i dont know what I did wrong to deserve this. 
And the girl they bitched about days ago is also hanging out with them.they don't even hide it from me anymore they straight out send me the same snaps🤐. I am tired , tired of them I can't pretend anymore . 
I hate this fake people I invested my so much time and emotions over them, but at the end it looks so pleasant to see our photos on social media everyone says bffgoals but nobody knows the truth, the smiles on the photos are fake, the people are shit and so their friendship . No one deserves to feel left out noone deserves to feel the I am feeling right now. 

Anxiety

Friends - who? Love - what ? Okay Parents - Yes, I know what are you talking about. Okay and you - 😈🙂

Alcohol

I don't have much friends, when I message/ call my friends and siblings they never pick my call. 
So many times I told some of my friends " I always feel lonely at least once a day talk to me for 5-10 min." and crying everyday. But no one comes to helps me they just hangup/ignore my phone call and never call back... Just now I called my some friends but no one pick and they all are online on whatsapp. 
Really need help.. please some talk to me. 


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