Mr.BananaWiggle... @saiscoffeejelly
Why do i care about him? why do i love him? He’s my best friend…right? he cares about me. He loves me. that’s what he said…
He goes from a sweet, caring, person to a screaming, accusing, scary person to a person breaking down and need of love. He would accuse me of things like “hiding things from him” and he would start screaming at me.
Why do I love him? he’s crossed my boundaries multiple times. trying to force me to do sexual things, trying to force me to give him my personal information (like address, zip code, state, city, full birth name first middle and last) and everytime i said no he would keep pressuring me and saying “Please i love you” “Please i love you so much” and i would still say no then he would start accusing me “why don’t you want to? don’t you love me?”
He would love to bring up my abuse for reasons i should do it “why do you do it with other men and not do it with me?” and “you can forgive the people who forced you to have sex with them why can’t you forgive me”
He disregards my triggers and my emotions, he doesn’t seem to care about anything i say, and when i still try to leave he starts apologizing and breaking down “I’m sorry please i didn’t mean to hurt you” “Please give me another chance please. I care so much about you. you know deep down i still care about you.” “You know i still love you. All i ever want to do is help you” “Please don’t leave me…i need you…you make me feel whole” “Please I love you…”
I still love him with all my heart
I still care about him with all my heart
I don’t know why but my heart and mind is telling me “He’s still a good person. he does love you. If you leave him you are just gonna hurt him. You can’t leave him. he loves you. he cares about you.”
I still wanna be his friend…I still care about him…I still love him…
I won’t try to leave because it’s like i’m attached to him
He’s draining me yes but i still wanna stay
I am losing people over this and one part of me is telling me to go but another part is telling me not to care and stay with him
Because he loves and cares for me
I love and care for him
