Career

Hello all, 
This is my first time on here and actually I've never reached out to anyone about my problems because I've always felt like I could handle them. Just recently, my boyfriend and I almost ended our relationships due to my actions. I'm someone who always wants things to go my way and I've been like that since birth (taurus lol) but because things don't always go my way at home, I rubbed off onto my boyfriend. We talked it out, and it was sure difficult but he is now giving me another chance. It's been 4 days, and I know things won't go back to normal for awhile, but I'm scared to lose him and I was wondering if anyone has any thoughts on if I should keep this going, or if anyone else has gone through the same? I just want things to get better.

Relationships

Why can't I freaking move on,I didn't even date him it sucks and hurts I just can't take it anymore, it's so obvious that he loves another girl so why can't I just move on I hate myself for this and it really hurts I can't take it anymore 

One Sided Love

The guy who has girflriend is too kind to me.. The problem is before some time he told me he liked me and if we wanted to be together.
I said I was not ready. Later I realized actually i have strong feelings towards him. But it's been around a month since he has a girflirend. Despite that fact, he is still showing affection (for example today he hugged me). It's so difficult for me, it makes me so confused and sad at the same time..like, am i viewed as a friend now? Or why is he keeping being like that... What should I do? 

Confusion

Idk from where to start. I’ve been feelings all these emotions altogether and it’s overwhelming I don’t know how to deal with it. Idk why I’m sharing it here but I couldn’t tell my friends exactly how I’m feeling about this thing. And by this thing i mean i fell in love with a guy who doesn’t love me back and it aches my heart knowing that he won’t be my future, even though we’re in a so called “relationship “. I would wanna say that he is toxic but he didn’t do any such thing with me that i should call him that. I used to be a very carefree and confident person until i met this guy and fell in love with. For starters i never thought i would ever fall for anyone because i tried to and it never happened with the genuine guys I’ve dated so I always thought I’m incapable of loving someone but idk how and when i fell for this guy let’s call him vansh. So we work in the company and he approached me and we vibed so much that i felt i know him since ages. Then we met and everything was going good he asked me to be his gf i said yes, all of these thing’s happened really quickly like within a week and we met again and i stayed with him and his parents for 4 days maybe that’s when i fell for him. After i came back from his place he started behaving weirdly I thought itsjust in my head but he actually started pulling away. It was very hurtful and i used to feel so lonely I didn’t even feel like bothering him so i never said anything to him because everytime i used to ask for him love and attentions he never cared and I believe you don’t have to ask for these things. If the person cares about you he/she takes out time for you but this wasn’t the case with vansh he used to say he cares but actions speak louder than words. So eventually i broke up with him after 2 months and we agreed on being friends and I thought I’ve moved on. Then he surprised me on my birthday and came to see me after 3 months i was happy but i wanted him to go at that point of time because i wanted to spend time with my friends and as I said i moved on so he wasn’t bothering me much but he stayed the night with us. He hates clubbing and i love it so my friends and I already planned to go clubbing but i knew he would never come so I didn’t even ask him but then out of no where he comes to me and says I don’t like it but I’ll go for you and we went he did a few things which made me think that he cares about me and after my birthday we didn’t talk for 2 days and i got very emotional didn’t feel like sharing it with my best friend because she doesn’t like him then called vishu but he didn’t pick my call so i ended up texting vansh and he responded within seconds and i told him to patchup and make things right. He told me a secret about his life which I don’t think any other girl would have accepted but me being blinded by his love accepted it even though I’ve always been against that thing, thinking that I’ll love him and he’ll try with his heart and soul this time. And he actually was very good for the first 5 days after our patchup and then again the old routine started happening of not giving time and this time it’s worst  we haven’t spoken for  5 days  and I’m stuck i wanna leave him
 Because I can’t let someone treat me like shit but whenever i listen to his voice I can’t do it.  My heart aches for myself knowing that he’ll never be mine but you can’t force someone to love you otherwise I would’ve tried that too😂 i really wanna fall in love again I don’t want this to be my only chance at love because this aint happening ever. I always wish the best for him but ik he’s not good for my mental peace but idk how to get away from this how to deal with this. I’m very bad at expressing and i was still not able to express how i feel because i was never an overthinker but since the day vans has entered my life I can’t stop thinking even for a sec which is very frustrating. I feel like I’ll go in depression if this continues. 


my crush texted me after 6 months of not seeing him… idk what he’s intentions are but god i still got that in my heart when i first saw bis text.. so what do you guys think is this just random way to saying hello or he’s trying to get my attention? 

3am Thoughts

This guy and decided to break up  last June due to relationship problems. I asked for a break so I could get over a few things. We still communicated but I just needed time to overcome some stuff. 
2 months later his dad passes away.
He had to hide away his pain and be there for his family, and being a brother to a younger sister and a friend to his mom, he has alot to shoulder. He closed off that side of him. I don't blame him, I could never understand what he is going through.
But I still love him till this current day because when my world was falling apart he just came in and calmed my situation. He feels like home which is something I've never really felt due to issues. 
He knows how I feel and I told him I would wait for him no matter how long it takes. 
I miss him so much. Everything around him constantly reminds me of him, its so hard to go on like this.
Sometimes I doubt there will be an us and I want to walk away but it's so hard I can't because he makes me feel like I'm okay as a person. It hurts and I miss him so much.
I don't really know what to do anymore 

Hi friends!
I would like to share what thoughts are running ryt now at @1:30am . 
During my initial days of job training I met a guy in my team. Felt so connected, I travelled 3 months with him. Later I couldn't clear training n I need to leave the job. I saw *tears* in his eyes that day when I was leaving. I have never seen a guy crying so after my father and brother for me!

Later I found some job in other state but couldn't come out of his thoughts. He is so connected to me but he kind of behaves uninterested,disconnected, egoistic n arrogant sometyms. He takes long time to respond to my text msgs. Hence 3 months ago I messaged him saying that "I am done with understanding you..I am done with everything". He didn't respond to that msg.

Recently a month ago...he again messaged me saying..he is sorry. He overreacted etc.. and I started to speak normally. He kind of talked to me intimately asking me to share pics of mine. For which I wasn't really ok. After few days when I was casually talking about his behaviour or what had hurt me about his behaviour, he abruptly left the chat. After a week gap, I messaged him " hi..how r u dng.." then he replied "I am done with talking. I  am done with feelings too". 

I don't understand his behaviour.  When I moved on, he himself msgd me stating sorry and later he himself left me by saying the same dialogues which I said him. I feel so disturbed by his behaviour. I feel he is kind of egoistic that he always wanted to ignore and wants me to crave back.but the connection we share reminds me of him. How do I get out of his thoughts!

Recently

Emotional Abuse

I have a male bestfriend and  he's my long-distance cousin too.Before our i use  have small crush on him. After becoming frds i use too call him every day and him all things happen to me. I use to believe that he will fall for me some day. But  6 months ago  he met a girl and he  proposed her . Before that day we wear having a small argument and he was very rude i expecting sorry from him  but he didn't called for 4 days it first time wait for so long after without msg and calls. At last I called him and he told me he has proposed a girl 15 days ago . I was so angry that he told me after 15 days . I started to ignore him i didn't call him for a week . After that we met in a function i ask him do you miss me .And his answer was no i didn't miss you. I was so hurt. But he was habit he was only person with whom I can talk freely and he was only boy either than family whom I talked with. I was attached him. So I decided to just keep as a frd talk to him once in week.This days make me believe "A very harmful addiction is attachment" . But I don't regret the days I was with him and talks we had.

Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts