Today is my 39th birthday and I feel horrible. At the end of May I was suspended from work due to something I was not responsible and at the beginning of of June I was fired. I managed to find a new job but it is only going to take off next month. In July my father passed away. Today I am feeling horrible 

Well happy belated Birthday, life is what you make out of it, bad thing will always happen, I am sorry to hear about you father, I can not imagine pain.
Start enjoing little things,achieve little thing thro out of you day, help someone, and most importantly, does not matter what happens, keep your had WAY UP!!!!
Negative thoughts will get you negative results, guess what Positive mind will get you...;)


Work

maybe right now

my journey is about healing

giving myself permission

to take a space and take care of myself

on my own

maybe right now my journey is about

having hope letting myself believe

that I deserve better

maybe right now my journey is about being home to my soul giving another chance to reclaim my joy and be who I am


Self Love

I feel relieved. I know it is gonna sound very mean or something but i feel relieved that i ended 7 year years of friendship with people who were my entire life at a point. They were my entire school life and tuition life and basically my life. It hurt for sure, it really really hurt. And cried my heart out. I cried so much that i could barely breathe. But i think those were the tears of relief. I feel relieved because it got too toxic for me at a point. I reached my saturation point. I could not take it anymore. They used to make fun of my insecurities and i could not take it. Playful rudeness is fun amongst friend but that has a limit. They crossed it. And whenever i used to confront them about the same, they made me feel bad about being too sensitive. Maybe i wasnt that sensitive. Words hurt. They really hurt. And they are with you for a very long time. Sometimes they stick with you throughout your lives. And that can be traumatizing. So that is why, i feel relieved.  It is so important to choose your chosen family very carefully. They stick with you for a major part of your life. I hope we know that we are not here to takke anybody’s shit. We do not owe anybody shit. Broken friendships hurt way too much. But since it was not worth it to be friends with them, i feel relieved that it is over.

Friends

I really need help 
I don't know how to approach 
I just don't wish to say a word to express. 
I feel weak I feel lost I feel dead in head ,
I am not able to figure out anything .  
I want to go beyond this 
And I need help . God please help .

3am Thoughts

I am a very forgiving person, so if I stop talking to you, you really went too far.

Someone here to talk??

Annoyed but Ambitious… looking… feeling… creating… growing… aspiring.
Weird combination? Eh, I guess not!! Feeling all type of ways is normal ❤️

I am missing good partner in my life ! I hope I will able to find out.

Just for note : I am boy not girl 🤣😃 
Lots of guys thought I am girl actually some  they looked at my  name and they thought 

ADHD

He I am here as I am all alone.
I dont have any of them with whom I can share my feelings. 
It isn't that I dont have friends, I have but for me they aren't that trustworthy.
I am sharing my story. 
It goes here... 
I was in class 9 and I was in a relationship witha girl. We were in the same class and used to stay in same hostel near our school. That year was going fine but on 31st december my parents came to know about us.
They were sad and werent haply as that was not my age for all these stuff.
Soon after the vacations i went back to the school and told her  i could continue with this as this is not the right tym for us and I went back to my class. 
After a month one of my friend  started  spreading rumours to every girl in our hostel that I was asking for my gf nudes and blah blah...  And thats the reason she broke up with me. And the year passed away with those rumours spreading. Soon after days we were appearing for our boards. 2 days before our maths exam she(my gf) and that friend went to the warden the owner of our hostel and complained about me that I was the one asking for nudes and other things. 
I tried proving myself but i was not able to. 
Soon after we finished our boards and my parent came to take me back. 
Sur called me in the office and he narrated everything to my parents. 
I felt ashamed of myself what have I done. I have spoiled  everything. I confessed my parents I  havent done anything. They told me okay beta we beleive you. But I have let their head down because of the girl and that friend I chose tto be with. 
Many things have changed now. 
Its been 3 years and i am scared to trust someone with whom I  can share my feelings, everything I want to.
I dont know how to overcome this. 


Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts