TO THE GUY I MET DURING MY HEALING PROCESS.
thank you <3
[it is so sad that we had to stop talking the way we did but I think we'll find each other again just not now, I really miss you and wish you could talk to me and sort things out but I also know it's not happening so just so you know you were very helpful to me I will always be grateful for YOU and the BOY before you. Both of you changed the way I see things and how I act towards situations NOW.]

that's so thoughtful and positive
this made me change the way I think about the guy I used to talk to and stopped talking

Gratitude

I miss you so much sister. Like i don’t know what’s wrong with us. But we hardly meet because we are busy . But we don’t talk like we use too . Now you don’t share things with me. And i came to know from someone else. It’s hurts like hell . Even if i come to talk you just stay in phone . Like either we fight with each other or get upset with each other. ( But our bond was never like this we were soo close . From last 3 years ) like i don’t know what to do

Faith plays a big role. It gives you courage to fight when you lose all hopes. It is the most important component to overcome struggles.

Other

This is just a reminder that you are loved and I love you too, be strong and don't give up...even if you can't take it anymore don't give up okay...promise me that whatever happens in the future you will keep going.
💞

Love

It was my first time,
Wearing a saree, 
I was seeking,
Your approval or 
Validation. 
Don't know exactly. 

All evening through,
I keep staring at you. 
There were times,
When both our eyes met,
We were searching, 
Me searching you,
You searching whom
I don't want to know about. 

Everyday,
I yearn for eyes to contact,
Everynight, 
I cry for all the moments we missed, 

I wish you smiled at me, 
Just once, 
Fake or forced,
Compelled or compromised, 
Just once, for me. 
At me, for all the efforts. 

It broke my heart,
When you laughed at me, 
With your female friend. 
When I walked past you. 

Why would you do that? 
It gave a final kick, 
To my every night broken heart, 
And it falls apart, 
Every piece of my heart unceremoniously, 
on my diaphragm. 
But why do I feel like,
It lodged in my lungs instead,
And, I couldn't breathe. 

Why would you do that? 
Wouldn't you know,
I was already hurting, 
By loving you.
I was already made fun of, 
For still being stuck on you, 
Even after three years. 

We crossed paths,
many a times tonight,
I sure lost count on my fingers, 
Your head never, 
once turned to me, 
Your eyes never,
tried to hold an eye contact. 
I hear from my bestfriend,
That you were staring at her. 
But that doesn't helps me move on either. 

I watch you watching your crush, 
I watch you watching me watch you,
But there is little you do about it. 
Atleast tell me not to stare at you. 
Call me out. 
End this unbearable suffering of 
An unrequited love. 
Break my heart in one go, 
Stop butchering it,
Time and again. 

I am hurting,
I am clutching my heart, 
Swallowing my pride,
Drinking back my tears, 
Still giving you my heart, 
In my eyes, 
For you to walk, 
All over it. 

My each day, 
Begins with you,
Running in my mind 
And ends with you
stomping over my heart. 

If only my eyes had a voice, 
Everyone would've gone deaf,
With my confession of love. 

I wanted to entwine
my little finger, with you, 
When I walked past you. 
I prayed for our shoulders,
To brush, atleast a little, 
When you walked past me. 
I wanted to hold
The hem of your shirt, 
Stop you, 
Just to make you, 
Look at me, 
Look as in not like the usual,
Where your fleeting eyes,
Brush past mine, 
Just as one of the hers,
Who were swooming over you,
But Look at me,
For who I was. 

I might seem stooping low,
But I was ready risking it all,
to raise in your eyes, 
Yet I fall, 
Lower than ever, 
In your list, 
Little do you know,
I try to associate, 
With your friends, 
Just because, for you. 

I am not your type, 
You were making it clear 
I learned it, 
Following your eyes. 
I want to tell you, 
You weren't my type at all, 
I knew, yet I chose you, 
Damnation take my soul, 
My heart wouldn't stop,
Skipping a heart beat
At your sight. 

Every night, I cry to sleep, 
Wishing for one small reason, 
To hate you, 
Not to hate you, 
that's far fetched,
To unlove you, 
To lose, atleast one cent, 
Of the interest I had in you. 

You are unhealthy to me,
And still I crave for your presence, 
I look forward to tomorrow, 
Just to look at you, 
One time again. 

I can't strip for you,
I already stripped,
My self respect for you,
My self esteem for you, 
I can't go down than this, 
That's not me.  
Why would you do this,
To me. 


I wish you had stopped me, 
I wish I hadn't met your eyes, 
I wish I hadn't showed up tonight, 
That would've hurted less, 
Than you laughing on me. 
But how could I? 
I had to see you, 
To stop you running in my brain, 
But you ruined my heart. 


Thanks, for watching me watching you. 
For letting me watch you, 
I was stupid to think, 
You like me
The way I like you, 
You can never stand close,
To my feelings. 

Again, I don't know, 
If it's okay, to ask for your help, 
To help me to help you, 
To let you free,
From my mind and my eyes, 
For your help to help me, 
To save my dying heart.


Frozen by brain, 
Dead by heart,
Let me ask you one last thing,
Let me to let you go. 





One Sided Love

i hate you so much i wish i had never met you before.

3am Thoughts

Memories are the best,they are the worst too....

Acquaintance

Everything would be finally fine if only I have the courage to k myself right now or as soon as possible.

Suicidal Ideation

You know how much I still wanna talk to you and tell you what's going on. I pray whoever you are with now makes you happy. I wish you never have to go through this whatever I have been. I hope you are happy now.. it's been a year .. maybe you have forgotten me but i still remember you.. I still have your letter with me and the chocolate cover with the heart card on it.. and that diary you gave me.. I will preserve it and maybe I won't even use it.. you know i wanted you to start writing first then I would use it.. but as we are not together i think it will be like blank. 
I miss you R!!! 

Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts