Though I have given up on trying to develop a sense of fashion, I have acquired a few takeaways from that endeavour. One of them is that I should consider participating in more social activities to enjoy myself whether or not I have company. It may feel awkward and pathetic, but it is a rather relieving experience.  

Affirmations

For the first time in a long time feel i feel like a bit of weight has been lifted off my shoulders. 

Happy

And it’s raining 
Ek chai aur songs and pakode wah bhai wah 😍

3am Thoughts

Now I'm done

Depression

All my friends have found the love of their lives. Its just me who's single. I know people be like -you gotta wait. You'll meet yours when its the right time.

Even i do wanna feel loved. 
I want someone to love me for who im. I ain't perfect, im quite different from an average girl. I don't know if I'll ever find love. 

Boyfriend

Ek Bt kehni Thi Ladkiyo... 
Soch samjh k patana Mujhe 
Warna Shadi Krni pdegi. ❤🥰

Life

Hurt and confused and in pain
We met through tinder. Had decided it was just for sex. Met. Hooked up. But we both kept chatting everyday and every night. 
Shared our hurts and pains. Shared our happiness and everything in between. Fought. Made up. Broke up. Got back together. 
I fell in love with him. Told him. He said that he loved me but diatanced himself a little from me. 
After that whenever we met it wasn't just sex. We spent time talking, watching movies, drinking and laughing. 
He was out of country for almost 2months. Due to time difference had a lot of fights. Took his silent treatment many times. Patched things up but always talked when he wanted virtual sex. Fought due to this. I got attached and he broke my heart and me by saying that I had no right over him. Kept saying "we are not a couple".
Accepted it. Tried moving on. Stopped talking. He came back to India. He kept messaging. Saying that I didn't care for him and many emotional things to take him back. I said yes for being just friends. But he wanted to talk daily and I did. 
He keeps telling me about other girls in his life. How some one proposed him for marriage and sends me screenshots of their chats. It hurts to hear this. 
I was supposed to meet him after 4months but he cancelled last minute and I snapped. I fought and he got angry. I was on a call with a guy friend when he kept messaging and so I replied late and said I was in on a call with a friend.
From that moment I have heard a lot about how I should meet any guy and sleep with them. I tried and tried to make him understand that I wasn't sleeping with anyone else but no use. And now we are not talking again. Broken up for good I feel. 
He says we aren't a couple, yet expects me to not think about dating anyone. He can sleep with anyone he wants to but I am not allowed the same liberty. 
What should I do? I am so confused and this sudden  silent treatment from him is causing me actual physical pain along with mental anguish

Breakup

So basically I asked this girl
Bear in mind is an Brown girl who has strict
Parents I really like her and whenever I asked her
If she wanted to be friends she said she doesn’t talk to boys. However I always use to see her always look my way and check me out I asked her again if she wanted to be friends months later she said the same thing saying she doesn’t talk to no boys am just confused on what I should do next I really like her she’s my type I barely pay attention to women but she’s different. Do I just wait it out for her to come to me or do I just move on.

Adulting

Many a times I get a feeling that my mother feels that I am not good enough. I do not disagree or have any excuses for my past mistakes or silly mistakes. Any work or responsibility given by her puts me under a lot of stress . Mostly it's due to that stress that I end up making more mistakes. It gets hard sometimes. She is a perfectionist and wants me to have a similar approach. If the work has any mistakes or is imperfect it's not acceptable to her or she gets disappointed or gets really angry.

Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts