Stressed!
Hello everyone! I have recently joined this community and already feeling better šā¦ But as you all know we are here to express our feelings, I have something for you guys to help me out with. I am sure it will help me.
So I am in a relationship with an older guyā¦ Yes thatās my typeāŗ
We have a gap of 9 years, but thatās not the issue. Recently he is facing financial issue due to covid and since he told me about the problem, I feel weāve started losing the connection between usā¦ By that I mean our schedule for the day use to be like Good morning msgs in the morning and then directly connecting at night over call for half an hour. But since past few weeks itās been a bumpy ride for me at least. He doesnāt msg me in the mornings and about the night calls, he does call me but idk I feel that, for him now a days its more of a task rather than an eagerness to talk to his GF that is me. I tried to discuss this with him and he said that āI am having a rough time right now so we should not be concerned about the distance which is growing between us. It will pass by and give me some time and everything will be sorted soonā. But TBH my instinct says something else, because in between we had small arguments and that was kind of upsetting for both of us and that has led to suspicion that he might be having an affair. Because I personally donāt like to check phone or personal msgs as it raises the issue of trust which matters to me a lot but this sort of behavior makes me feel insecure and I really donāt know how I should help myself outā¦ I donāt want to take any wrong step because at some point of time at least I knew both of us loved each other immensely but if you ask me current situation I donāt have an answer on his behalfā¦ But I still love him the same way.
Iām not sure about the dating part. But being a guy I can assure you that if he is having financial issues then itās the worst dayās of his life. I have been there. Nothing feels right. Itās even worst than breakup. I have experienced it personally. So if you really love him just try to support him emotionally and financially if possible. May be he will try to discontinue with you because he knows that everyone want financial stability including you, me and everyone. You should stick to him and deal with this situation together. But I can guarantee you that if you be with him in his worst time then he will definitely be with you his entire life. Age is just a number. So donāt worry about that. Keep smiling while you do it allš
Thank you for your advice. I really appreciate it. I just have a doubt, you have mentioned that he will discontinue with youā¦ What exactly do you mean? break up or just distancing for a while? And also how can I make him happy in his worst days?
Yes probably he will try to breakup with you because a guy would think that he wonāt be able to give what you deserve or expect from a guy. To him happy you can try with doing something which he really likes. Like if he passionate about driving, take him for a long drive or something of that sort where only you both can enjoy your personal time. And then you can start the conversation about his life and issues. But donāt rush into asking about issues. You just have to tell him āIf you feel like sharing your issues with me, I will definitely listen to you and we will make this thing work togetherā.
