So what is your view towards carnal desires in a relationship? My gf has been a bit emotionally distant with me for the last few weeks. So when I met her this week, I had some level of physical contact with her. Though her body responded, I felt that she was psychologically distant. And today when I wanted to hug her, she did not want to. I felt like I was pushing her too much. I called her after reaching home and she responded really harshly. That she said all the guys are touchy and can’t stay normal. she had been in a relationship before being with me(for 7 years) and currently she is cheating with me and also hiding a lot from me. I can sense that even though she says she loves me and all, she might not be attracted toward me anymore - both emotionally and carnally. I am highly confused because I am not after a woman’s body only. I want to build a stable relation with her which I have been trying to establish for the last 7 years. Did we have close moments? Yes, we did. And back then she was not so rude or taken aback by my touch. Can it be that as she is not interested in me, that is why she does not like my touching of her anymore?
I am going through a lot actually. And now this, I do not know what to do or say. Because I am not loving her only to be intimate with her. I do love her. And the painful fact is that recently all she finds me is problems and problems. I am afraid to give up on our love and then again, with each passing day it is becoming hard to keep hope in this relationship.
Hey… i understand your feelings . I am also a female and can understand your gf’s perspective as well . It’s normal to have carnal desires in a relationship since you have been together for 7 years . So, it’s absolutely normal and you are definitely not rushing just after intimacy . If she didn’t respond this way before with your touch , i suggest you can talk to her once . Try to make her normal and understand why is she reacting like this ? And , don’t worry about the fact that she just sees problems in you, it’s like when we talk to a new person , we just see the good things in them , but when we get to know them closely and for such a long time , we know their faults and sometimes , we get pissed off . It happens in a long term relationship . So, don’t worry about this . Also, i understand that it’s not easy , but don’t give up on her as you love her . So, please try to talk to her about this . I am sure you get to know something .
Else, if you think (are sure )that she’s cheating on you , then i think it’s high time that you talk to her and clarify .
If she loves you , try to maintain that spark because with time , people in relationship don’t do certain things to make one another feel special . Do something special for her .
Just keep your love if you both love one another .
If she’s cheating you , then also please confront her . I know it will be hard but being with you for 7 years , if she’s doing this then may be you should take a decision and it’s right time to do so . You have a future , don’t just stick to the fact that , you have been with her for 7 years . I know it’s a really long time , but still you have future in your own hands .
In both the cases, please don’t decide anything of your own . 7 years is really a long time . May be , there is a distance just because of the lack of special efforts or the way of expressing love , because girls always love pampering and extra efforts . So, please talk to her first about everything deeply . Try to get her point and then take any decision .
I am sure , you will be able to do it . It’s not easy but it will be worth it .
If you wish to get in touch or share about it further , you can write it to me on instagram . My user name is speak.your.heart.out.and.smile
I hope i am able to help you .