So my post might not seem as bad as others but Iโm a weak twig to break, when I had my first gf I was happy and content but she had a relationship addiction, RelationShip Addiction is when a person gets in a relationship for themselves to feel better and once they no longer have that feeling they leave their partner ,and she also manipulated me and blackmailed me but in my case she broke up with me In 8 hrs in the relationshipโฆ,I was broken I thought I would be able to tell my parents yay I finnaly not single and see her face bright up when I was thinking of going to a cafe but all those ideas all shattered,instead I just thought of whatโs wrong with me am I ugly,Iโm fat,boring,cant keep a relationship, and she kept getting more bfโs and I just thought wow I guess that answers my question and after a year of not trusting people and blending with the background I went to the next grade and I tried my luck,6 times, 1 friendzoned me hard,4 I learned they just dont like me and the last one i kept my space since she was going through stuff too so I respected her privacy, and this quarantine stuff hit me alone with my thoughts of Iโm fat,ugly,boring,offputting,failure bc my dad always bragged when he was young girls chased him and me just trying desperately, the one that friendzoned me hard I went to a ramen bar with her, talked everyday about our day and friends,and she was beautiful, we both were Hispanic had curly hair and loved anime and coffee, the day I confessed she said the usual I see u as a friend and that echoed in my head for that day, I was spiraling to pot of confusion and deppression I would sleep everyday just hugging my pillow and crying after waking up after having a dream dating a girl and going for a hug and poof pillow this also made me have a short temper at anything I would cry in any arguement that was even pointless and I would run at the bathroom and I would get pissed at everything that was stupid my temper is so bad I ignored everyone at school even teachers asking me a question I wouldnt care I just gave up on everything at that point I even ignored friendly goodbyes and people trying to get my attention and just sleep cuz I already had good grades and just wanted to go home and sleep and watch Netflix in the pitch dark, I would contemplate how Iโm not a man and how Iโm a weak little shit that cant deal with anyone and rn my family is struggling financially and that scares me and hopefully nothing bad will happen soon.
Hey there
You know even I am struggling with the similar problem . Even most of the time i think that I am not dateable and I am ugly , but there are few days when I feel like why should I think what everyone else is thinking but trust me you will get better. Dont worry things will fall in place soon . And itโs okay to be friendzone . I can understand what you are going through just hold on the hope . :)
Everyone finds somebody one day - even if takes very long - but you need to love yourself enough first.
Amrinderpreet @youareimportant
Ok, So here it is:
You need to start loving yourself and get good out of you. Since its covid-19, and you are so very concerned of your looks, the real person who loves you doesnโt look at your face/body. they go on your soul. and then u didnโt find one, which is totally fine. At least you know that what you donโt want in life. Everyone came to teach a lesson, learn from it and gather up.
you said you are amazing in studies, so why not to focus on that and be career oriented for now. Forget about dating for now and prioritize your career right now and your body. Start working out, even if its only 20 mints in the whole day.
Love yourself and find online jobs like tutoring as you will earn money and be busy.