So here I'm spending my new year evening at home as my parents aren't allowing me to go outside and this happened bcoz of my bf 🥺 fuck I'm alot angry on him!! And he's with my frnds enjoying new year night without me (idk exactly with my frnds or his frnds coz he is offline from afternoon) n my bf called me now n told that your bf told to transfer him 500 I told her idk have esa bol use uska phir se call aya n she said he is saying ki u have saving vo usse gpay karde like wtf hevis enjoying there getting all drunk upar se asking money from me... Fuck man I just hate him!! 😶

Boyfriend

If you spend your time chasing butterflies, they will just fly away.
But if you build a beautiful garden, the butterflies will come.
Dont chase. ATTRACT.

Self Esteem

My dad publicly admitted that he hates me...

Anxiety

Yaar Dhapudi, 
Every girl reminds me of you yaar. Bas har jagah tumhe hi dhudhta rehta hu. You know bahar i try to be tough but deep down I'm fragile like glass. Bas tumhare ek thought and done I burst into tears. 

Love

Me and and partner used to live together but recently when I was back home for a month busy and couldn’t talk to him much, we had a huge fight and we almost broke up but then we sorted things out.. Then yesterday we were talking romantically and later had a very small argument after which he told me that he now learned to live without me, and if any day I chose to break up from him, he will let me go smoothly.. Is this line concerning? What should I do about it? 

#Bored

3am Thoughts

i hope my day end with a happy night sleep but all i do is wake up late by night and think of rubbish and absolute things that are not in my hands like why are people leaving me? why i am not hired by them? why people behave the way they do? why dog are afraid of me even when i am giving them there favorite treats? 

I have been away from people for so long not because of covid but because of my own self that now I don't even know how to talk to someone. 
Either i get too attached with them or i don't want to be with them . There is nothing in between. But the moment i really get attached with someone and want to talk to them then i become too weird because i care too much and i make them feel special and then i get ghosted. Like there are already a very few people i can actually feel comfortable with then why do they just get away.
Do i deserve to be treated like this Everytime. Whenever i see people with best friends who listen to them and like have fun together. I become to envious. I don't have anyone whom i can call my best friend. Whom i can have fun with. Or who actually knows me and still is there with me.
I wonder is it really me? Is it my fault?
And then i go to square one which is not being able to talk to anyone anymore.
Now i think that I can't be with anyone so maybe it is really better to be alone than to think about every action of another person and eventually being ghosted

Friends

Whatever you are running from is already inside your head. 

Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts