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MarriageThought

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Anonymous

So friends, i have beem meeting guys for arrange marriage, but i’m not able to decide what to ask them or how to judge that this guy would be a good husband.
I understand that they should be willing to do the basics which is love, respect, caring etc. But what else should I ask them or know about thwm in order to decide that he is the one.
Please help.

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Profile picture for Now&Me member @allen_walker8
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23 replies
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Anonymous

It’s simple actually, its not what you should ask, its what type of person (character) are you and what compatiblity you’re looking for…i mean most girls want rich husband but don’t care abt his physique and environment (house, mental, emotional compatibility)
some girls (independent) don’t really care abt rich husband but they want that environment (house, mental, emotional compatibility)
Some girls want their husband to be a good looking good physique…with priority genes for thier future kid…
Now you know what of person you are and want…if u’re emotional then in some conversation you can ask something philosophical and see how depth his thinking…other advice - you should ask them what type of wife they want (not in materialistic, physical but mentally)

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Anonymous

I really work hard to write and explain it with core features…i hope it helps or it will be a waste for me 😔

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Anonymous

I m a bit materialistic, but only in the sense that I expect an expensive gift on my bday and obviously after marriage on anniversary
But i don’t want a rich husband, someone earning same as me is fine.
I don’t want a very handsome guy, someone who is average looking is fine for me
So in this case what all shall I ask him to evaluate if he is a good person??

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Anonymous

In this case i will suggest you to ask upfront and direct questions, see, looks are subjective… only you can decide, how much he earns , family/mutual friend/relative will tell you…
Some questions that you can ask are:-

How will we manage finances…(asses how far he thinks, it will reflect his stability level)

How will we make decisions together (asses your compatibility)
What are your views on children (ask abt his childhood)
What is he meant/think about it commitment
Do you have any debt?
Ask abt his anger and handling
Ask if he’s already or had in any kind of relationship
…rest you already know and that’s it …
Remember no one can guarantee you that you he will be a ur ideal husband bcs relationship works on cooperation level… that’s all you can ask just hope for good future 👍…and relax everything will be fine… congratulations in advance…

(I used all my brain power to answer this question, I’m proud so of myself 🤧)

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Anonymous

Sorry for some grammatical errors 🙏

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Anonymous

I already have answer to few of these questions
He already knows that I spend to my heart’s content and he is okay with it, and he is not like that which i m okay with because if both would be spenders, how would we have any savings
I know he isn’t that close to his siblings in the sense that he doesn’t know what is going on at all times in their life, it may be due to age difference between them, but he is always there for them and would do anything for them
I m very short tempered and talking to him gives me an idea that he is much more calm than I am which i really would like in my partner
I never bring up topic of kids with anyone because i myself keep fluctuating about the idea of it

Rest of the questions i would definitely check with him.

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Anonymous

It’s fine, it’s not like i have written everything with correct grammar

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Anonymous

Well, then i think its a MATCH…you know they say that opposite attracts… similarly in relationship one must be calm and other can be wild…i think its a perfect match for you✌️

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Anonymous

Ok👍

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Anonymous

Yeah, because of these points i do think it would be a good match but it’s only been a few days that we started talking, let’s see how it goes
Thank you for your time 😊

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Anonymous

Pleasure is all mine… hope my time investment help you even little bit 🙏

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Anonymous

It definitely did 😊

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Anonymous

👍

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Anonymous

Hey if we want to know somebody as a person and their real behaviour… would you suggest ways for that too

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Anonymous

GM🌄
Sure, there’s a simple rule, as you are already talking to him, you just have to observe how he PRIORITIES to different CHALLENGES like…if a person is short tempered but showing himself as calm, while talking to him it will reflect in his conversation, if he takes long pause to reply even for some small thing it reflects as maybe he’s not being fully real and scripting the answer in his head (not. Truthful).

Focus on details -such as did he mentioned same thing but now its scinerio is different, and keep doing it or if u noticed 2-3 times already ,
If he taking frequent pauses in conversation
If he avoids something that will reflect his true identity
…last observe the behaviour, a calm person do his things and handle it in easy manner not in hasty …

(I just woke up and that’s all i can think off🙏)

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Anonymous

Oh, okay
Surely will notice all these things.
Thank you.

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Anonymous

Hey would you like to connect?

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Anonymous

See the way they approach you and the way they talk, if it feels they are real then go for it

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Anonymous

Okay
Thank you for your advice.

Profile picture for Now&Me member @allen_walker8

VedforYou @allen_walker8

Understand the fact that no one can truly be judged just by asking them anything within a few days of meeting them. It’s mostly a behavioural thing. The way he responds to you in situations. Make it long term … possibly a few months during which the fake show he might be putting up will go down (no one can hold on to a fake personality for long) and then … you’ll get your answer.

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Anonymous

Okay
Thank you for your advice 😊

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Anonymous

Don’t be. Hope you find the perfect guy for you 🙌🏻

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Anonymous

😁😊🫂

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