So. Does anybody just have that feeling with your friends- when you are from different financial backgrounds (I do not want to use the word status here), there are some differences in your friendship? I am from a more affluent background (not super rich but well off, my family has their own financial problems) than all my friends and I feel like my friends see or treat me differently. These are friends of 10 years. When we were young, it didn’t bother me too much but now that I’m older I feel like it comes in the way. I don’t want it to come in the way and I never have from my side tbh. I do not show off, I’m very modest, frugal but I also love occasional luxury because I can afford it. Whenever I buy something expensive or I splurge on something, I feel embarrassed to share it with my friends because I feel they would judge me and make me feel guilty about it. I shower them with gifts they ask for every time I visit but I feel like they judge me differently and I overthink it all. Almost every time I feel bad about being in a more comfortable financial situation than they are but is that really something I should be ashamed of? That my parents earn so and so more than theirs? I hate talking about money with anyone and with these friends, no way. I worry and overthink a lot about what others think and when it comes to money, it is a sensitive topic. I feel they gang up and talk behind my back because in this aspect, I am the odd one out and it bothers me. They have always joked about me being ‘rich’ and I take it sportingly but I always wonder if there’s some truth between those words and it’s actually insulting me. Why is it okay to make fun of a ‘rich’ person and it’s super offensive if you make fun of someone being poor. It’s okay in my group when they all call each other broke or stingy because they’re all the same. If I would ever do it, I immediately know that somebody would feel insulted. I have never ever made fun of their earnings, lifestyle, spending habits etc. because it’s just rude. They are nice people and I’m in this position where I just take the snide remarks but it affects me. Is it not possible for friends of different financial backgrounds to get along so closely? Or it always going to be a lingering issue that holds us back from connecting.
I relate to this so much. I have felt the same thing so many times. In college, everyone used to think I’m a spoilt brat just because I was a little different you could say or because my spending habits were a little different. I never made anyone feel bad about this or never belittled anyone else but still people did make jokes.
Apart from college, new people that I meet always have some remark about my lifestyle or about where I live or my spending habits and I never know what to say too. It’s just disturbing because I am not showing off or anything. Im just living my life so just let me like you live yours. I get soooo pissed off! Somewhere this barrier does come in between. Sometimes people become friends with you only because you’re rich or have good networks and that sucks :)
Right?! I’m sure they think of me as spoilt as well. I wish everything wasn’t about money. Friends should be friends without having to make the other person feel bad. Or be jealous of them.
EXACTLY!!! but people really don’t get that.