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Now&Me @nowandme

Ask Deepika Anything ✨

Meet Deepika, a relationship coach with a passion for empowering people. She has been featured in the ELLE magazine and has an expertise in helping people take control of their lives and relationships.

Deepika specialises in identifying toxic relationships and aiding people to escape them. And guess what, she’s now one of our experts right here on Now&Me ツ

So, come engage in this open discussion ♡

You can post your questions below by February 6, 2023 (Monday).

Deepika will answer all the questions by February 7, 2023 (Tuesday).

If you would like to speak to Deepika on a 1-on-1 basis, you can start an expert chat with her on Now&Me 🧡

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Profile picture for Now&Me member @sleek_wire
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57 replies
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Anonymous

Why is it so hard to let go of someone? my ex is toxic but I cant ignore her and she uses me always

Profile picture for Now&Me member @thedeepikashah

Deepika S. @thedeepikashah

It’s hard because it’s better to be with someone than to be all alone. Each time she calls you for something or another thing, it makes you feel good. So what can you do? Block her number. You don’t owe her any explanation as to why you stopped talking with her

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Deepika S. @thedeepikashah

Been there. Giving up whatever I liked so that he can be happy. But it never ends well for you. If you keep this going ultimately it will ruin you. I would love to know more about this issue you are facing so that you can reclaim your identity (the first chat with me is free)

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Anonymous

I am very clear of moving on as done with breakup due to different career, location, and family background clashes. He is also clear and moving on. But I still get overwhelmed of emotions sometimes and hop in his life again & again. Even I dont want that. But I cant control myself and end up doing long emotional msgs sometimes. This seems to me lowering my image and self esteem too. Just I am rpefering love over all logics. What should I do in this situation?

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Deepika S. @thedeepikashah

I feel it’s become more of a habit for you and a bad one because you can’t seem to let go. One simple thing you can do - is to ask yourself ’ why can’t I let go’ and keep writing the answers. One of them might help you. But if it’s getting complicated then ask someone ( like me 😊)

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Aryan Vani @sleek_wire

I don’t want to move on, still have some hope. is it okay to do this?

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This thought has been deleted by the thought author
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Deepika S. @thedeepikashah

Need more information. Your first chat with me is free

This thought has been deleted by the thought author
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Deepika S. @thedeepikashah

There is a deeper issue here. Need more background story

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Anonymous

U know I try my best to show that people’s word doesn’t hurt me at all But in the end it does
N it leads to overthinking I often feel like am disrespecting my elders or what
Why they call me oversmart…overconfident n
all
I m not yrr…I know my flaws It’s just that try my best to hide them But in that process I shine like a oversmart…overconfident person

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Deepika S. @thedeepikashah

I understand how it feels to be misunderstood and no matter what you do it continues to get worse. But you need to remember not everyone’s opinion is worth giving attention to. You need to become stronger emotionally to not let those comments get to you.

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Anonymous

Hello Deepika, my question was
How to start convention with girl and make conversations long

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Deepika S. @thedeepikashah

I am assuming you know this girl as a friend already. So you can start your conversation with something common between you two. And then continue by asking more about her. Hope this helps

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Deepika S. @thedeepikashah

There is no right or wrong answer. It truly depends on you. In a general sense, it means nothing serious. No commitment. No expectation

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Anonymous

So I have a fam function and I think due to the shit happening in my life, I don’t deserve to get ready even

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Deepika S. @thedeepikashah

That’s a big word ‘deserve’. I would say nothing could be so bad that you say such a thing. Let’s talk so that I understand what is going on

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Anonymous

I’ve lost interest in women. I don’t even look at girls passing by on roads or whenever I’m outside, not even a bit. Idk what’s going on in my mind

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Deepika S. @thedeepikashah

I need to understand what you have gone through to answer this. Let’s connect.

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Anonymous

Since I parted paths with my gf 3 years ago no other women seems to attract me even if they initiate it.
Every single women seems insincere and fictitious.

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Deepika S. @thedeepikashah

Breakups are always painful. Been there. So take your time to heal. Whoever approaches you let them know you are not ready for a relationship yet. Also, talk with close ones or maybe a coach about how you are feeling currently because that is stopping you from trusting anyone.

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Anonymous

Hi,
I want attention, love and care from my boyfriend but I don’t want to ask for it.

Profile picture for Now&Me member @thedeepikashah

Deepika S. @thedeepikashah

Love and care are the basis of any relationship but if these things are lacking then kindly have a heartfelt conversation with him about this. Because you deserve to be loved ♡

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Anonymous

What’s the difference between love and relationship?

Profile picture for Now&Me member @thedeepikashah

Deepika S. @thedeepikashah

I would best describe love as a feeling that makes you feel empowered and you look forward to being with that person, sharing thoughts and emotions. The relationship is just the next step in this. In fact, it happens naturally when both people feel connected mutually

Profile picture for Now&Me member @chef_tj_1433
@chef_tj_1433

Why girls are so complicated?

Profile picture for Now&Me member @thedeepikashah

Deepika S. @thedeepikashah

Are we 😅 for eg: I am easier to read if the person I am talking with actually listens to what I’m trying to say.

Profile picture for Now&Me member @chef_tj_1433
@chef_tj_1433

Not every girls but 98.99% girls are really complicated and can’t understand what’s their next move… Can’t be predicted… Especially can’t be trusted… I just can’t understand why they are like that!

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Deepika S. @thedeepikashah

Interesting questions ✨ Keep them coming

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Anonymous

How to not to attached with people???

Profile picture for Now&Me member @thedeepikashah

Deepika S. @thedeepikashah

Do you mean in a relationship? Or in a general sense?

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Anonymous

In general sense

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Anonymous

Im a queer cisgender male and I have always been in relationship with good men but lately realised it was never a commitment from them nor from me even if they showed I always kept myself aback. I want to be with them but somehow I break up eventually. I’m not confused but I’m insecure about so many things, and not that I didn’t give 100% but idk I never gave assurance as well. Idk whether I make sense or not. 🙂

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Deepika S. @thedeepikashah

I think I get it. But I will need to talk with you to understand where those insecurities are coming from.

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Anonymous

Huh? What kind of question is that?!

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Anonymous

My friend love me but not ready for marriage. What can I do?

Profile picture for Now&Me member @thedeepikashah

Deepika S. @thedeepikashah

Have you asked why? Need more info here like your relationship status, how long have you been together

Anonymous

It’s been more than 100 days of surprise breakup from her side. We were in 4 years of relationship, 2 of those in covid were I grew too habitual of her.
This impacted my daily routine, work productivity and completely messed up with my mental health. I still give her a benefit of doubt and think that she is going through a lot herself and will soon be wanting to get back. But she seems to have moved on quite quickly, making me think how is it even possible.

I want to let go of her thoughts and focus on work now. I am not able to move on and things have got worse only with time. I need this cycle to end now.

Profile picture for Now&Me member @thedeepikashah

Deepika S. @thedeepikashah

I understand how it must be. The best thing you can do is give yourself time to heal. 4 years is a long time to be with someone. Don’t force yourself to let go of her thoughts because that will make you remember her more. Instead, try to talk with yourself to have a closure

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Anonymous

He wants to keep it casual, i don’t want to, i am breaking up with him, but he still wants me to be in his contact, remain friends, is there any possibility that he is still interested in me?

Profile picture for Now&Me member @thedeepikashah

Deepika S. @thedeepikashah

You should take time to see how he behaves. I would suggest don’t show your emotions and letting time help you decide. Trust your intuition. It’s always right

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Anonymous

Been in a long distnace relationship for seven months. He broke up with me over texts, portraying the blame over me which made me sabotage myself a lot of times… while I was in a relationship with him, I didn’t feel like he was trying to improve as I was or he constantly prioritized his friendships over me… he didn’t even care abt my accident while breaking up… or my problems while we were together, but I still feel I lacked in everything or I wasn’t trying enough and so he left. How do I cope with it and move on for good?

Profile picture for Now&Me member @thedeepikashah

Deepika S. @thedeepikashah

That’s the first thing we do when a breakup happens. We blame ourselves. There are two things you can do to move on - 1) Write down all the things you did and he didn’t do in the relationship 2) then ask yourself was it really not enough? Don’t let negative thoughts cloud your judgments. I know it’s easier said than done but give it some time. Time will help ease the pain ✨

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Anonymous

Time really helps.🤍 I tried writing them down, analyzing things and gave myself enough closure… Now that I think of it, letting go off someone who didn’t have ur clarity is a boon! Thankyou:)

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Smayara @smayara

Every evening i feel anxious i feel depressed bcz i find myself alone and I don’t like sunset timing it gives me so much negativity
I want that i have someone or anyone to be with me at that time
I have to focus on my study so i can’t go outside daily
What should i have to do?

@piyush_1328

Hello mam,
My name is Piyush. I want to share my relationship problem. I love one girl and she also loves me…but now the thing her marriage will fix this year and she’s saying that I don’t have that guts to tell about u to my family. And she says that for her family is more important and she has 2 sister and she’s elder…she says that if I’ll do love marriage then my sister’s will also do the same and her father is very much strict. Now the thing is she told me that we should stop talking with each other and move on …I said ok but the thing is she stays with her mother alone in her village and her parents are not in touch because they can’t connect with each other. And my problem is her village is very worst at crime. and when ever I think to not to talk with her I just keep thinking that is she safe there. Have she eaten food or not…usko kahi kuch hua toh nai na…mam muje pata hai ki hum dono saath Mai kabhi aa nai paenge but muje uska chinta hota hai ki voh gao mai akeli hai …safe toh hai na voh…and voh kisi se baat bhi nai karti…agar mai usse baat bhi kar dunga toh fir voh thik hai ki nai yeh muje kaise malum padega…and she’s very strong…she said that u don’t worry tu bus move on ho…she has accepted anything…mera problem sirf yehi hai ki mai uska chinta karna kaise chod du…voh safe hai ki nai yeh sochna kaise chod du …uske liye darr hai muje kahi use kuch ho na jaye… please help me I can’t focus on my career…

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Deepika S. @thedeepikashah

You have to become emotionally stronger. It’s not one day of work. You have to work 1% each day on yourself. Stopping her thoughts suddenly is not possible but you can start by thinking one less each day

kathy @lilfishy

I want this guy back for emotional support but I got in a fight with him and he blocked me n I cussed him out again n he called police on me for harassing him.

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Anonymous

How to keep that same spark in a relationship for a lifetime?

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Deepika S. @thedeepikashah

That’s everyday work. Take one day at a time. Somedays you would be just a couple used to each other so there might be no long talks and then one day you both would be engrossed in discussing a movie. I would suggest taking impromptu decisions. Like a lunch date or a long drive. Keep surprising each other

@supple_eye

I have incest ?

@speedy_parrot_3

Hii Medam Good evening This is Vijetha From Gudivada Andhra Pradesh
Mam Actually my parents set my marriage with Anand Kumar Lingavarapu 2021 But Small issues break my marriage proposal soo same person get back in my life or no please explain please Medam He went to back I’m very happy so please Answer mam

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