Roses are red
Khloe Kardashian is screwed
Don't be so **f-ing** rude

m e m e s 

Self Love

I made a song. It goes to my crush. It is called 'What If':

If you show the whole world, would you love me? Will you love me if I change my appearance for you? If I change my personality, would you love me, do you care? I've almost watched your video, I want to press dislike because I'm trying to win, but I like it again. shh. Annoyingly, you're still handsome and annoyingly you have wonderful personality that makes me laugh. You make me happy, you make me cry.

If I cut myself? What if I killed myself for you? Would you love me? You know me? Will you take care of me if you let me control? Can you tell me three words I need to hear? If I helped comfort you because the world is over and you need comfort, would you say, 'I love you? '

Will you recognize my love for you? Will I notice my existence? Or am I just another follower of yours? I love everything about you, do you know what I exist? Don't you care at all? What if? Everything is filled with 'What ifs! ' Because nothing can make you fall in love with me.

If I cut myself? What if I killed myself for you? Would you love me? You know me? Will you take care of me if you let me control? Can you tell me three words I need to hear? If I helped comfort you because the world is over and you need comfort, would you say, 'I love you? '

I am just another foolish human who has been in love with you. I say to myself, 'I'm done, '... damn it, I fell again. I continue to indulge in you and your charms after telling myself that I am done with you, but I know that I still love you. Unlike those who hate you, I love and care for you, but...

If I cut myself? What if I killed myself for you? Would you love me? You know me? Will you take care of me if you let me control? Can you tell me three words I need to hear? If I helped comfort you because the world is over and you need comfort, would you say, 'I love you? '

Crush

And I wouldn't marry me either 
A pathological people pleaser
Who only wanted you to see her......
And am fading thinking...
Do something, babe say something 
Lose something, babe risk something...
(You're losing me)


Another day another song lyric. This one is playing in my mind too. One of the saddest songs I have ever heard.  I can also relate to the first two lines when am not feeling good. But I am feeling good now. So no problem. Also I am not too good in expressing my thoughts so you people will probably be seeing me posting song lyrics...

Music

Just wanted to share this one which I wrote out of boredom and emptiness.

Knowing that you are not gonna love me back
Knowing that I can't talk you 
Knowing that I can't take you outta my mind
My heart still loves you,wants you
It adores you the most 

No matter if you ignored me
No matter if you hurt me
No matter if you left me
My heart still loves you,wants you
It adores you the most 

Your absence makes me tremble
Your cry makes me weak
Your sadness makes me feel dead
Because my heart still loves you,wants you
It adores you the most

3am Thoughts

Almost there￼

Love

i will always remember you, and your feeling whenever i'll fall in love again, i'll remember the way you hold my hand, the innocent smile you had, whenever i talked endlessly. i close my eyes, and remember all that.
i will always remember you, when so ever i'll come across the word "love", because being loved by you was so easy, calm and unusual.
i will always remember you whenever your swirls will come near your eyes, the feelings will be alive again,  the softness of your fingers which feebly rubbed against my face.
i will always remember you, whenever i'll see dimples on someone's face, like how it made me remember your lovable smile, with even more dimples whenever we smiled while doing eye contact.
i'll always remember you, whenever someone will come to hug me, i'll remember the way how you hold me tight to tell me non-verbaly to stay a little longer, i'll close my eyes and feel you, only you.
i will always remember you. And it's only you

Can someone please criticize this love letter? If you have any advice please feel free to comment as I would greatly appreciate it. There might be some grammatical errors, so please leave me a comment. Thank You!

Reasons why I like you. Your smile, you smile very brightly. It lights up my world. Your laugh, whenever you laugh it makes me cheerful, ultimately making me laugh as well. Your eyes, as I stare deeply into your eyes, I think about the future and what it inevitably holds for us. Your hair, I think I’m attracted to girls with curly hair. Is that weird? Lol. The way you talk, even though I don’t say much or know how to properly respond, I feel like I can talk to you all day. Your presence, you are the highlight of my day and I get excited when I see you. Your personality, you're positive and charismatic, even though you may have a naughty mouth sometimes. You're also a hard worker, which is rare and strangely attractive. Last but not least, your butt. Is that rude? Honestly, it’s just a plus. I don’t care about trivial things like that. wink*

When did I start liking you? Well at first I didn’t think much of you. To me, you were just another high school girl. You didn’t talk much at first, which was totally normal because you were new, so I didn’t think much of you. It wasn’t until you called me a bitch that I finally opened up to you. Which is also weird. Strangely enough, it made felt comfortable around you until I started catching feelings for you. I started developing insecurities because I didn’t want to displease you. I felt insecure about the way I talked because at times I couldn’t find the correct words. I didn’t want to say anything wrong, so I began to overthink. I would eventually find a suitable answer after 5 minutes of evaluating the question, but at that point, it didn’t matter anymore because you were doing something else. I thought it would be easier if I avoided talking to you and it was, but I still couldn’t control my feelings. 

Nowadays I barely see you. I only get to see you once a week. Sometimes once every two weeks. Even when I did see you, we rarely talk because it was always so busy. Now all I can do is think about you and it hurts. But it’s understandable, you’re still a student and you shouldn’t be working too hard anyways. I just miss you a lot. 

You should live your life the way it was meant to be. I don’t want stray you from a greater path and it pains me knowing that I’ll only hold you back. I would be too embarrassed when it comes to meeting your parents. How can a worthless man like me take care of their beautiful daughter? I’m working at Walmart because I don’t know what I want to be. Why do I have to be anything? Why can’t I just be happy? I think the purpose of life is to find love. I want someone to love me unconditionally without judging me, but if I loved that person, wouldn’t I want them to be in a better position with a better person? In the end, it’s a lose-lose situation for me. This is my fate. Regardless, it seems as though you are already receiving love. The way you talk and connect to people is something I envy. Something I wish I can instinctively do. It gives me reassurance knowing that you’ll still be happy after I leave. It makes it a lot easier. 

Did you like the shows I recommended? In a way I wanted you to know how I felt. I wanted you to see that I was hurting, even if it wasn’t obvious. I wanted you to hold me close to your heart as you tightly squeezed me. I wanted you to be my reason to live. I wanted a happy ending. 

Mianhae (name). As you are the first and last girl I will ever love. Saranghae! 


Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts