Recently I have been feeling numbness…and today I don’t feel sad or happy…my chest just feels heavy. All I can feel is the heaviness of my chest, I also have a lot of headaches…which I hate. I also notice that I have been feeling very lazy and haven’t done any hw either, I get stressed because the homework is hard so I don’t do it, but I also get stressed because I don’t do it, I know the deadline will end soon…I get stressed either way if I do or don’t do it.
This is affecting my grades, in English class, my B dropped to an F…in math I had a B and now a C, the thing is it’s really affecting my grades and I can’t seem to find a way to feel better. Someone already suggested me to meditate and I did but that didn’t work, another person told me to journal but it doesn’t help either way.
And, I keep having more and more thoughts about suicide, I know myself enough to know that I wouldn’t do such a thing to hurt my family so I do cut more than before. I crave to feel something so I cut because I don’t care if it’s pain…I just want to feel something that is not numb.