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Anonymous

Please leave any comments with opinions/advice. This is making my mental health problems harder sometimes (anxiety/depression/ptsd/derealization). I have been sating a guy for a few months who I have completely fallen in love with but I am scared the relationship is turning toxic. I do not want to leave him because I do love him very much but I do need to figure out what will be best for me. There have been many different incidents, but lately he has been going through my phone and getting upset about pictures of my past relationships that I had forgotten were still on there. I thought I deleted them all for him, including all the old pictures on my social media of my ex’s, but this morning he found that there were some more ex pictures on a picture editing app on my phone which I had honestly forgotten about, so I deleted all of those for him and he is still upset. I also deleted all of my old messages and unfollowed some people off of social media for him. He has yet to do the same things for me so it is kind of double standards. I don’t know how to feel about this anymore and if he is being controlling or if it is okay because he is sensitive about it

14 Comments
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Anonymous

I used to go through the same thing in my previous relationship. We dated for about 4 years and after 2 years I started to realise how toxic he was. He used to be so possessive and restrictive and didn’t used to let me meet my friends also. After I ended the relationship (it took a lot of guts) my life became SOOOOO much better. I grew as a person, seriously. I learnt so much about myself and actually started meeting better people in life.

Anonymous

Ya actually… Do you really loved that guy? Or just played with him for 4 year
If your changing your self with new Apporchunities coming in your life and blaming that person. 
You where wrong as he accepted you as your that time. 
You must sort with him and give him time to understand your situation 
Introduce your new friends with him
Don’t to chutyapas as you have BF 
Don’t play with heart 
 
You can understand with in a week so why you wasted 4 years of boths life

Anonymous

Ask your self is really he was wrong or you changed with situation? 
 
That all where his mistakes or your too 
 
 
I don’t think so you will be happy always

Anonymous

Don’t give some one wrong suggestions as they have value of that person 
 
You never had

k
@kkkkkkk

People like you are selfish they use until it’s ok for them 
 
 
Once they got other people around them they just ignore

Anonymous

Hey there. I really don’t think this behaviour is acceptable. It is not him being sensitive but it is actually very very controlling. It is not correct and you don’t have to live with it. Sometimes people are so insecure about themselves that they project it on their partner and make them feel bad about it. You don’t have to unfollow people off social media because of him, it’s not a healthy behaviour. Also, it is a genuine thing that you forgot to delete your ex’s pictures but what’s the big deal??? It’s your wish first of all and secondly, he has no right to be angry about it?

a
@anant

Agreed 100%

j
@jianhongzhou

Sometimes, you need “set your own bottom line”, clearly write it down when you calm down. Then, next time, DO it.
Maybe you are just scared of “Loss” of a relationship. However, without changing yourself, it is difficult to have good relationship.
I am not sure how the site works, but hope you got my support.

Anonymous

Just talk with him with smile and care he will be ok… Show him that you really care for him don’t ignore… Ignorance is more dangerous in relationship with sensitive people…
 
It’s not wrong to delete and unfollow your past from social media as he is your past why you want to hold him in your life as you already with some one 
 
 
And please clear all the things don’t hide things that make insecurities and garbage in relationship 
 
 
You both will be ok he care about you more than him self

Anonymous

I get it when you are in a relationship, your partner becomes your comfort space and it is so hard to leave your comfort zone and try something that you have no clue about. But to be honest it is not even better when it is hampering your peace of mind. And his actions are not justified in any sense and he has to understand that he cannot control you because as cliche it sounds but in a relationship you are partners of equal share and you deserve the space.

s
@sockpuppy

Hello, I agree with the comments saying it’s inappropriate. He is controlling and manipulating, hurting your privacy and disrespecting you with his actions.
He seems to be extremely unsure about himself and the relationship. It makes me wonder if he has something to hide and overcompensates by invading your space. This isn’t love, this is dependency. Please be careful.

Much love

y
@yourfriend

He’s just being insure. Just remember, its not you vs your man but you both vs the issue that’s coming. Just view it with a different perspective. If you believe you guys love each so much, maybe even live your lives with each other, so these are just only some bad days, not bad people.
Have a nice day😃

i
@ineedandcanhelp

I think honestly, there should be trust in a relationship, they should trust you when you say you’re over your exes, but if they don’t, then you can talk to him about it openly instead of deleting them all the time, you delete once, he will want you to do more things, you can ensure him that you’re no longer interested in anyone but him and if he still doesn’t understand or believe you’ll delete everything related to your past but he needs to start trusting, this is a small issue, ahead in the relationship it’ll be a problem if this keeps happening

Anonymous

I think the best thing for you to do is hold his hand and ask him
if he really thinks you love him. Ask him why he doubts you and tell
him you have been struggling so much. Ask him why he hasn’t done the same for you.Ask him if he really trusts you and that you feel you need him.
try holding his hand he should give those words a thought. Make sure you love him because you were meant to do so.😄😄😄😄😄