Please guys, help me out otherwise I might go mad in few days. Since my childhood I always wanted to become an adult as fast as I can because I wanted to be away from my parents. Yeah my home is no less than a war zone almost everyday. When I was a kid, I used to be scared of my mom so I used to listen to everything what she asked me to do actually even now am scared of her and that’s why my mental growth is zero. 4 years ago I managed to get a seat in an engineering college in the farthest place possible from my house so that no one asks me to come home in holidays. So for 3 years I used to go home only for the summer vacation and winter vacation (i.e once in 6 months). Though I was not happy in college too because of various reasons but still it was better than staying with my parents. There were many times when all my friends had gone home and I had stayed all alone in the hostel. Yeah it was bit depressing but still I felt good. But now due to this lockdown am back to my home and have been her for almost 2 months now and trust me the relationship of my parents has gone worse. My mom has got lot of complaints against my dad and maybe they are justified but now as an adult i thought of helping her to see beyond this. The main problem is she is too rigid to change. She just thinks whatever she thinks or assumes is right and its not only about dad but for everyone in the family. She never got any friends so she never even tries anymore to make one and that’s why she cant share anything with anyone. Before, she used to atleast share with her parents or sister but now even they have understood that my mom herself doesn’t want to find a solution because she has closed her eyes to see anything good about my dad… Well my dad is a weird person because he might not get angry like mom but he gives such a cold and irritating answer that anyone will get angry after talking to him because even my maternal grand parents tried to suggest him some tips to help my mom in household chores but he doesn’t change. He thinks however he is there is nothing wrong and what he told me is my mom is not intelligent enough to understand him so that’s why he doesn’t talk with her. Since the lockdown I have been trying to explain my mom that life is not about clinging to all your complaints but it is about trying to find solution to those problems but everyday if I start talking anything about dad, she just gets angry and says u just mind your business don’t try to help me out. she just says that she knows there is no solution to this. I am trying so hard to show her the solution but why can’t she see it. I even told her that if you say this that mind your own business then let me run away from the house that would be the most selfish thing I can do and then she just says i have got lot of work don’t disturb me with your stupid things. I have the guts to run away because last year I had booked my tickets to go to an unknown place but I had stopped only because I wanted to help my mom out of this problem and now for past 2 months I have been trying to show her a path but she is just in denial mode. It is not only this 2 months. Since my childhood my mom told me all her problems that she faced with dad, or in-laws or even with her parents but now as I have grown up I will have my own say right and I feel all these years she has been clinging to all of these problems like a magnet. Is it really soo difficult to forgive your husband if he tried to misbehave with your parents. Yes, it might be difficult for maybe one 1 year 2 years but she has been angry with him for past 10 years. Cmon man, like even I had got a friend who called me slut bitch when she was angry 4 years ago but now if she comes and talk to me I don’t think I will have that hatred towards her anymore. Please help what should I do? Should I just stop showing solutions to her and mind my own business or should I keep trying?
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