Okay so one month is not enough
I have not started recovering yet
I have been hoping and praying and still I will but in this one month I haven’t changed even a bit - I am still in a anxious
I am still in a way addicted to him
I am still the looser version of myself that he hated and told me that it will destroy us
I am still hoping for him to come around
I am still hoping for things to change dramatically deep down
I have not gone out
I have not met new people
I don’t like to interact with anyone
I am still deep down truly connected to the concept of love relationship forever ♾ kinda story which we always used to tell each other and eventually we literally loved that story and each other but we lost the grip and we both fell on head and got injured!
Now what ?
30 days are not enough
May be another 30 days will make me forget about it?
I haven’t talked with him in 30 days and he hasn’t initiated a contract either but we both still have same dp we still follow each other on social media but that rarely means anything
I think I need more 30 days to accept that it’s over !
Get yourself busy into something like work, gym, music, dance anything to fill the void and make a list of things you hated about him and look at it whenever you miss him you’ll be fine in 2 months …
So like in next month is our relationship’s anniversary we have not broken up officially! And next to next month is his birthday! So basically I haven’t started recovering in one month and it’s gonna be more Curial in coming 2 months because to important dates are approaching! I have to completely act like nothing matters and keep moving on with my life but deep down it’s killing my soul from inside! It was my first relationship 3 years of togetherness and we messed it up in the end now my pride his pride my trauma his trauma and bitter memories are in our way so first we need to get rid of those memories and then maybe find way towards ourselves first and then towards each other or may be towards new beginnings oh god why it is so scary ! I truly loved him he loved me we survived so much together but in final 45 days before our anniversary we both got tired and almost gave up not gave up on each other but we gave up on constant tiring fights and misunderstandings but that indirectly took us away from each other ! In order to heal ourselves we had to part our ways I really hope we both recover and find our ways back to each other it may sound stupid at this point but deep down my heart knows we both are meant to be and we will be till then let him heal , let me heal myself and let’s see what life does to us 💔
Stop thinking so much… block him move on
