Mx Shay @sxkurxchxn
Okay so… Me and my crush held hands- well not exactly we were arm wrestling
And since it was like 10:30 she was really sleepy and I was standing so she just rested her head on me- T////T
BUT then my friend call me… well so my two school friends call me a lot when I’m hanging out with my other friends and my crush likes to take my phone and talk to them a lot and one of them in specific let’s call her “P” (cause her name starts with P) . My crush likes talking to P a lot and I’m over here trying to convince myself that maybe she just wants to be friends with her. But then when we switched to video call my crush muted the call and said I like her eyes… And obviously I’m getting jealous ; - ;. Then she starts saying that she doesn’t like curly hair and likes straight hair- (P has curly hair and i have straight hair but that didn’t make me feel any better)
I felt likes asking her if she’s into girls… but that would be weird because she knows I’m bi and that I have a crush on someone a.k.a her (but she doesn’t know that)
So am i overthinking or… Do you think my crush likes P… I honestly feel like it’s one - sided love and I already found out that my crush likes a guy cause she told me… so I basically know she’s not interested in me and she’s prolly straight…
Akash Dalal @skybroker
tbh you should ask her or confront your feeling n thoughts to her. make it clear. this will help you to make decisions and overcome overthinking
Mx Shay @sxkurxchxn
I thought of that too- but the thing is i dont want to ruin our friendship… or make it awkward
Akash Dalal @skybroker
you are not ruining anything you are doing what is right for your mental health and that comes first. you come first than others.
That’s a pretty tricky situation. Do you think that your crush could be bi? She has a crush on a boy, but if she’s talking about what kinds of hair she likes on girls and saying in private to you instead of to P about what pretty eyes she has, she may be more attracted to girls, curious about being in a relationship with another girl, or have more intimate feelings about girls than she realizes.
From what I can tell, it seems like you and her are pretty close, she confides in you and is comfortable sharing deep feelings with you, and vice versa, because you are out to her as bi. I think that the priority in this situation is to find out if she is straight or not. If she is, it will probably be a letdown, because you like her, but at least you’d have a peace of mind and not have to hide your feelings, wondering if she likes you back. If she is gay or bi, you will very likely be one of the first people she comes out to, because A. You’re really close and B. You’re already out to her, and she knows that you can sympathize. If she isn’t straight, then it’s possible, even probable that she will have feelings for you, because she knows you are bi and trusts you.
So now the hard part-how to get her thinking about if she is bi or gay, and how she feels towards the different genders casually (friends, who you trust, who you are more comfortable confiding in), romantically (who you want to date), and sexually (who you are sexually attracted to). My favorite method that I think would work really well to get her thinking about this, is bringing up a trouble, problem, or insecurity you have about being bi, then ask “What would you do if you were in my shoes?” or “What would you do if you were bi?” It is a great way to get advice and carries none of the awkwardness or uncomfortability (if that’s a word) that can occur even between the best of friends. Of course, you could just ask her outright, which is an option, but that could make her nervous or uncomfortable talking about it when she’s not ready, which would be counterproductive.
Sorry for how long this is, I hope some of it helps or that you can use my advice. Let me know how it goes
Mx Shay @sxkurxchxn
Thank you so much for responding! I’ll try to ask her indirectly what her sexuality is. and Have a nice day!
Happy to help, you too!
honestly, just ask her if she’s into girls, or if she likes anyone. I’m not sure if your crush likes P or not, it’s hard to tell, but I don’t think she does.
Mx Shay @sxkurxchxn
I could ask her if she’s into girls or not but… she would probably get the hint i like her because she knows I’m bi… So I’m trying to think of a way i could indirectly ask her without being sus
maybe say you like a girl, and want to tell her but don’t know how she’d react. Ask her how she’d react for an idea of how your crush might act, but subtly enough that she doesn’t realise it’s her. Or ask if she likes someone. Or get a friend to ask if she likes girls. I’m not sure sorry!!
Mx Shay @sxkurxchxn
the first idea sounds like something I could ask… And I already know she likes a guy she told me who he is… and don’t be sorry it’s okay! thanks for trying to help though
Totally welcome :D
okay, try to ask one of your friends to confront her, ask if she is Bi. If she is not… well, try to get over her, if she is, then congrats! :D
