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Home / Thoughts / Ok so… Over the past 8 months, I got really close...
Anonymous
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Ok so…
Over the past 8 months, I got really close with one of my friends. We know each other since 4th grade and have been good friends. Now he has become a really important part of my life. We literally know every single thing about each other. I guess this pretty much sums up how great our bonding is.
We kinda had(have?) a thing and expressed our love to each other couple of times. But then both of us somewhere were unsure that the relationship might ruin our friendship maybe. So we decided not to think about so much at least for now.
He is one of those guys, who almost every other girl wants to date, just because of his personality, and also he is good at flirting lol. I think, 5-6 months ago, he started dating a girl. I was shocked and idk. Despite being so close, he didn’t tell me anything about it that hurt the most. I found out through his insta bio and immediately asked him. Some of the things said by him were, “it’s just an under trail gf, we met online so not a serious one. All these other chicks will keep on coming but you are my constant! I have a feeling that I might end up with you. How are you feeling right now?” I told him that I’m sad and didn’t expect this, but I guess I’m happy that you found someone. The fact that I was crying in the washroom while talking all this with him. This was the first time I have ever cried because of any guy. I felt like I have lost the chance of being with him just because I was scared. I don’t know but I felt like been cheated on without even being in a relationship. But guess what, they broke up in I guess a week. He was like, “It felt weird.”
A few days later he indirectly asked me out. But I was confused. After that, I started having trust issues. Even after knowing the person is telling the truth, a part of me doesn’t want to believe it. He has no idea how much his ‘one-week relationship with his under trail gf’ affected me. I still do love him and might probably love him forever but I don’t want to get into a relationship with him now. What if he goes around and starts dating someone else again? Because back then he literally said, “they will keep on coming”. I don’t want to get hurt again. But I also feel like I might be the happiest if I’m with him. It’s just too much confusion…

2 Comments
Post anonymously?
v

Hey? How are you, like literally?
I think you take it slow; confront him about his feelings, tell him how do you feel about him… tell him to answer to you truthfully, otherwise there’s no point… try to see if both of you are on the same level or not;
If you think you are both in the same level, take it slow, like real slow and always ask him about how he feels about all this.

b

heyyy, im glad you had the courage to voice out your feelings!
not trying to offend you or your friend, but his action of having an undertrail gf while trying to keep you by his side was kind of toxic, it is quite an irresponsible act imo
ik this will be easy for me to say, but if its me i would break it off w him, i think you might alr have this thought inside u as you sound like you are starting to have mix feelings for this dude

anyway i wish you all the very best upon resolving this matter !