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โ€บEmotional Abuseโ€บThought

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Ok so I searched a but around the web and found this place to justโ€ฆ Idk, vent? Iโ€™ve got a lot of stuff in my head that Iโ€™ve talked to the people involved with and I canโ€™t not say it somewhere.

First off, me (Enby/18) and this girl (F/20), letโ€™s call her Dora, are moving from our home town to a city at the other end of the country, NZ.

The reason Iโ€™m doing it is because Iโ€™ve been clashing with my parents a lot more frequently recently because as Iโ€™ve matured, Iโ€™ve grown to be more like them and we spark.

The reason Dora is doing it is because her mother, Viv, is not exactly the best mother. She has, as of the last 2-6 months, A; shaken Dora while telling her that Dora is the sole cause of Vicโ€™s suicidal feelings and attempts. B; thrown a WiFi modem, that Dora bought, towards Dora, intending to hit her but hitting the wall instead, and then complaining a day later why the WiFi wasnโ€™t working after half the components werenโ€™t working when it hit the wall. C; Minimized Doraโ€™s thoughts and feelings about being made to feel guilty about her motherโ€™s suicidal thoughts and attempts, brushing them off as โ€œhappening months ago, you shouldnโ€™t be worrying about it anymoreโ€ when Dora is actively scared about her mother whenever sheโ€™s out for an extended period.

Keep in mind these events listed are days if not weeks apart, and these are just three examples. These types of things happen almost every day.

Also, Viv is loving and caring as soon as someone is in the room, until she feels they are apart of the family. Then she wonโ€™t care if they (including me) are in the room when she flips at Dora. Only that I should leave the room and occupy myself while I try not to listen through the door at my best friend getting verbally berated. Nothing more than verbal happens while Iโ€™m around, but physical stuff, like grabbing shoulders and shaking and throwing Dora through doorways happens when itโ€™s only them two in the house.

Iโ€™m actively scared for Doraโ€™s life some nights when Iโ€™m told about it, and not sure about whatโ€™s gonna happen to Viv or Dora when something does snap.

I just need a place to say this stuff, so Iโ€™m glad I found somewhere, and this is only one story within my friend group. Iโ€™ll tell another in another post. Iโ€™ll make it so all of these arenโ€™t anonymous so people can follow along.

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2 replies
Profile picture for Now&Me member @k9nzaki

Eva ๐Ÿ’• @k9nzaki


iโ€™m very late sorry iโ€™m new and i just want to say look out for dora. her mother is very toxic to her ; blaming her for her problems when she is responsible for her feelings , domestic abuse and putting on an act in front of people. i know iโ€™m the worst person saying this but if her mother is feeling sucdal as much as dora will hate her she should take her mother to help. because if her mother ever sucded as much as dora hates her it would mentally break her down. after all the trauma dora is getting youโ€™re there to give her the reassurance and support dora needs. as for you, look out for your parents as well, arguments are obviously natural , growing up they become more and more in depth ? like they have a deeper meaning because they are able to tell you things you were too young to know. they are probably always thinking about you as well all the time and if you are an only child theyโ€™re always thinking about you ( talking from someone whoโ€™s an only child ) and worrying for you. sorry is this was unhelpful itโ€™s not good for you or dora ( anyone in general ) to be separated from their families ( unless itโ€™s doraโ€™s situation where she is going through domestic abuse ) last words from me i love you both stay safe xx


Thank you for the kind words. Both Dora and I have loved moving here and have gotten relationships with our parents. Distance definitely helps. On another note, I am not an only child (sister 3.5 years younger) but Dora is.

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