Thought

If you or somebody you know is currently struggling, please take deep breaths and reach out to somebody. Here are few resources that may help.
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Anonymous

My mom is so toxic that sometimes I wonder how does she sleep at night doing what she does to people. How do such people justify themselves to their God? Such a manipulator. So bad to her own children and family yet the nicest to others.
People always say good things about her and I assume she speaks bad about us outside.
She talks to my ex who abused me physically. And an event is coming up where he might be present. If she talks to that guy I swear I will cut all ties with her.
I had a boyfriend who had proposed to me. We wanted to get married but she created such a big scene and I had to say no to him cause she said things like “If his parents come to our house I’ll insult them and say horrible things to them.” I’m 27 now and single. When people ask why I’m not married yet she brags that our daughter wants to marry someone of our choice. What a load of horse-shit! She walks like she is the perfect person on the earth after causing so much damage to our family. It’s not like we all don’t know how to shout back or abuse or say worse things to her. We chose not to. My dad always says “Only love can change her so be nice to her.”
All the trauma she has put me through I haven’t received a single apology from her yet I behave normally with her pretending that nothing happened. But I despise her fake personality.
She talks to boys (she wanted son who would drive her around, take her shopping). Let’s out every secret of our family to these dumbfucks she talks to. I don’t trust her. I don’t know when I’ll lose control and leave my house. She blames my father for the troubled relationship she has with her kids but in reality we grew up and understood how horrible of a human she is. Dad has nothing to do with it.
I can’t comprehend how a mother can be like this to her children. How can someone be so selfish… Hear this… She wanted me to marry a rich guy so she can lead a comfortable life…
Idk man. Why is she like this… What do I do…
I can’t imagine what my dad must have been through. What would you guys do?

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Profile picture for Now&Me member @agoodlistenerhuman
Profile picture for Now&Me member @lost_not_found
4 replies
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Anonymous

First of all. Lot of positive vibes to you for surviving.

Profile picture for Now&Me member @agoodlistenerhuman

Brutallyhonest @agoodlistenerhuman

I am so so sorry that you’ve to go through all of this. I can’t precisely feel your pain but i can definitely say that you are one hell of a survivor. My heart also goes out for your dad who has still kept the family intact in spite of such a critical scenario. I can’t really be right in my advice, but from my point of view, i would suggest you to talk to your dad and get married to the guy you like or of your father’s choice without even informing or involving her. once you get married to someone good just move out and don’t entertain her decisions as they are greed and selfish ones. always be in touch with your dad and not your mom.

Anonymous

I’ve a friend who is in a similar situation like this, it just sucks. No matter how start she tries it’s just another failed attempt in changing her mom. She cant even make her consider a different point of view let alone changing it. Maybe in time she will realise it but that time ain’t going to happen anytime soon. Or maybe she won’t.

Not everyone can be open minded and take criticism, but we can. We can see people for what they are. We can do that without judging them. Life teaches us so many things if we allow ourselves to. So maybe take this as another lesson. Stop trying to be believe that she’ll change and adapt yourself, I mean it would be pretty hard for you to have a narrow mind and be selfish, it might be the same for her. Our believes drives us, shapes us.

People will only see something when they’re actually ready to see even if it’s already there. That’s a line from HIMYM I guess. I’m sure you’ll find a way that hurts you the least.

Profile picture for Now&Me member @lost_not_found

Nyx @lost_not_found

Thats messed up girl. 😭 I hope hings get better for you.

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