My first time to report in front of all the leads (managerial position) was a success. I discussed about the tool I developed for months as a global initiative. I did not get nervous but this just only proves that I can do better in actual than in virtual.

Work

Taxi's gonna be late.

College

Hello, 
Take baby steps, dont stress out by seeing or thinking about so many things in one go. 
I know you will handle this very well. 
Because no doubt you are very strong…


Affirmations

Feeling down..... Don't know what's going on......what is happening.......

I am soo insecure about myself. About the way I look and for being the person I am. I think that I am not pretty and my body makes me look even more ugly. My friends constantly keep on telling me that I am beautiful and my family treats me like I am the prettiest girl in the world, but then there are these few people who have said things about me that make me feel that I am not good enough. My ex constantly kept mentioning my blackhead and my facial hair and how my hair looked bad and he has only appreciated me once or twice but all those things he mentioned about me were not to make me feel bad, he's a good guy and still a good friend, he just said those things to make fun of me, which we usually did to each other, but that is still stuck in my head. Then there was his friend who was too sweet to me in person but then I heard that she didn't really like me and said things behind my back that "I don' know what XXX (my ex) even saw in YYY(me) to be with her". And I have been soo much insecure about myself. I have always felt that I am not good enough ever since I got to know about her saying stuff like that. After the breakup I am trying to focus more on myself and trying to love myself. But it is soo hard. These insecurities were there even before these things happened so it's not actually these incidents which triggered my insecurities but it has surely increased it even more. I click pictures of myself and send it to my friends and tell them that see I am soo cute or I am so beautiful just look at me. But this is just to tell them that I love myself and I am more trying to convince myself than tell them. And sometimes when my friend say things like you look like shit, again they don't mean it, its just what friends usually do. But that again goes straight to my heart and cut deeper in my insecurities. I have been trying to love myself but its soo damn hard to fall for yourself. 
People usually say things like get rid of toxic people. But the only toxic person in my life is me. How do I get rid of myself?


Insecurity

Good 

Acne

I feel fucked. I hate my life and what’s become of it. I’m dating this guy and he’s ruining me. He just left me for something, he doesn’t care or so much as bother how I am. He says I love you as a morning routine like he barely means it. He’s stuck on his parents who pressurise him to do the wrong thing even though he’s well aware of it. He’s too self absorbed and I’ve made myself available to him entirely. We’re in a long distance and he puts zero effort to atleast try and keep it working. I hate my whole life. I am responsible for the sort of power I’ve given him over my emotions. I’m in a great deal of pain, have been crying since morning and he happily cuts the call. He’ll spend hours on the couch watching tv rather than investing a little bit of himself in this fucking relationship. I can’t tell him because he starts blaming me and makes me for guilty for feeling this way. I feel neglected, mistreated and shattered. I love him so much that I’m making a fool of myself while he’s out there doing whatever it is he does. I feel awfully bad and don’t know what to do.

Girlfriend

If there is someone in need for friend, I'm here.
Age : 15
Hobbies : Gaming, Drawing, Music
Gender: Male

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