My dad is affecting me mentally. We argued yesterday continuing a bit this morning about how it was affecting me. I had written him a letter about a week earlier and showed it to him. I doubt he even read the whole thing because he only paid attention to what I had bolded in it. He had also blamed my mom for influencing me to do it when she had nothing to do with it. She knew I was writing it just didn’t include anything or give me ideas. Yesterday my sister also didn’t get to eat dinner because of him, he ate her food and when she came in and said she was hungry (we were at his girlfriend’s parents house) all he said was “You should’ve eaten it when it was here”. She was sitting out in his truck because she didn’t want to deal with him. I gave her my leftover mozzarella sticks from what I had to eat, but that was the only thing she had to eat yesterday for dinner. I wish our mother had full custody of us. Judging by that who knows what will happen next…I guess I’ll have to wait until Sunday.
Sean_75 @raindrops_moon
This will really affect yourself a lot physically and mentally, the best would be seeking help from another adult that could help you. You have to stop from being hurt and all those abusing, I wasn’t familiar with this situation but here’s some information if it does helps, stay strong as always
https://psychcentral.com/blog/imperfect/2018/08/10-tips-for-dealing-with-your-toxic-parents#10-tips-for-coping-with-dysfunctional,-alcoholic,-or-toxic-parents
The only one I can really go to is my mom when it comes to him. She’s known him longer between the relationship he has made with his “family” (my mom, sister, and me). Thankfully they are divorced. I would try talking to someone on his side of the family about this except I think they will stand up for him if I say something, especially his brother. He thinks he’s a good father when he’s actually not… I would rather go to court than just have him see both me and my sister every Sunday and every other weekend.
Sean_75 @raindrops_moon
Yea, this would be better for you and your sister, I really hope things will be better
Hopefully yeah. But the fact that he did that though…it’s just cruel. He has a motive. I can possibly just see him torturing me and my sister if we argue with him about something related to him. Then yesterday he brought up multiple times that “We’re still going to be seeing them and doing things with them for a long time” (his girlfriend and her child)… Just makes us feel like crap because the only time he actually wants to do/talk to us is mainly when we’re at his girlfriend’s house. He literally tries to Impress her. It’s been the same for the last 3 girls he was with…
Here is the letter I wrote:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1swP9d0ehRLOFBhAY_pCyZt_pbFUy0vDz0lZw8cR6Suk/edit
Sean_75 @raindrops_moon
Though I couldn’t read the doc, but yea that was just toxic- and abusing, Ó-Ò;
Yeah- it’s through my school acc. Although I could copy and paste it TvT
It’s long though-
The letter be like:
Im writing this to you to tell you, how I feel because it is not possible that I get to talk to you face to face.
You focus on your own relationships more than you focus on your’s and your daughters. There are times we don’t even want to see you on the weekends because you are so focused on the bigger picture of “I need to make a good impression in front of my family and my girlfriend” And the people you get with aren’t the problem, it’s you c:
You are affecting our mental and physical health, you’re affecting it so much to the point that it’s not even funny. And no, MOM WAS NEVER “brain-washing” us. We just never had the courage to confront you about it until now. Yes, I’m being honest. And im not gonna lie but it’s like every single day. It is like A farting hippo instead of worse. It’s like we’re on electronics because all you ever do is talk to Crystal and it’s annoying. Then another thing is that you act differently towards their kid(s) and us. You have a more “positive” relationship with their kids than you do with us. You compare us with their kids without even knowing it. You even compare us to Brady and Lilly! Like you seem so interested in Brady’s band stuff more than mine! Nobody ever said anything to me about it the only thing I heard band-related that day was Brady doing drums or something and then me mentioning the band festival. You think you’d want to have something you can be proud of for once in your life and then it doesn’t happen. Then it’s been
Wait there’s more-
girlfriend after girlfriend. How many more times do we have to go through this just for it to satisfy you?! And this has happened within the length of 2-3 years, and I’m sick of dealing with it. Almost every girl that you had gotten with after you and mom got divorced we have stayed in their house! You treat every girl the same. You don’t even realize how bad you’ve hurt me going through this my whole life, and now you’re dragging Abby into your mess! You won’t even bother talking to us. And don’t start with “You guys are on your tablets all the time” crap. Just because we are on our tablets doesn’t mean you can’t start a conversation with us. We will listen to you if you ask us something or whatever. And here’s another thing, you have proven to both me and Abby that you cannot be alone with just us, we always have to see someone whenever you get us. Put yourself in both my and Abby’s shoes, How do you think it feels having all of this being pushed into your life and struggling because of it? It has affected me so badly that everything I’ve been holding inside is affecting the relationship between me, mom, Abby, and Mark. We’re becoming you! You barely pay attention to our interests or anything either. You have to ask us what we like, you should know by now! Oh and here’s another thing, I don’t know if Crystal told you at all. But the night Crystal and Grace stayed over. During the movie out in the kitchen, I came out as demisexual which Means only feel sexually attracted to someone when they have an emotional bond with the person. They can be gay, straight, bisexual, or pansexual, girlfriend after girlfriend. How many more times do we have to go through this just for it to satisfy you?! And this has happened within the length of 2-3 years, and I’m sick of dealing with it. Almost every girl that you had gotten with after you and mom got divorced we have stayed in their house! You treat every girl the same. You don’t even realize how bad you’ve hurt me going through this my whole life, and now you’re dragging Abby into your mess! You won’t even bother talking to us. And don’t start with “You guys are on your tablets all the time” crap. Just because we are on our tablets doesn’t mean you can’t start a conversation with us. We will listen to you if you ask us something or whatever. And here’s another thing, you have proven to both me and Abby that you cannot be alone with just us, we always have to see someone whenever you get us. Put yourself in both my and Abby’s shoes, How do you think it feels having all of this being pushed into your life and struggling because of it? It has affected me so badly that everything I’ve been holding inside is affecting the relationship between me, mom, Abby, and Mark. We’re becoming you! You barely pay attention to our interests or anything either. You have to ask us what we like, you should know by now! Oh and here’s another thing, I don’t know if Crystal told you at all. But the night Crystal and Grace stayed over. During the movie out in the kitchen, I came out as demisexual which Means only feel sexually attracted to someone when they have an emotional bond with the person. They can be gay, straight, bisexual, or pansexual, and may have any gender identity. It’s updated since then, Im now Pansexual which means “not limited in sexual choice with regard to biological sex, gender, or gender identity.” I didn’t want to tell you because I didn’t know how you would react to it. It sucks when you don’t know if you can come out to your dad because you don’t know if he’s going to be disgusted by that. Another thing, I’m GenderFluid too. “Gender fluidity refers to change over time in a person’s gender expression or gender identity, or both. That change might be in expression, but not identity, or in identity, but not expression. Or both expression and identity might change together.” So I can identify as either Male or Female. You see, I bet right there you don’t even know what I’m talking about or what I am. WHILE I’m with a GIRL! I’m not going through a phase, as you would probably say. The reason I didn’t even feel okay telling you in the first place was that you would say “It’s just a phase” or “Knock it off” I’m tired of hiding my feelings. Isn’t it depressing that I came out to Crystal before I felt okay coming out to you?! You probably think that it’s not okay for people to feel that way! A person is a person no matter who or what they are, we all have feelings. I GET BULLIED FOR THIS IN SCHOOL! Constantly I have people asking me my pronouns, sexuality, gender! BY THE SAME PEOPLE! I AM GETTING HARASSED AND IT SUCKS! And don’t tell me “People are like that, suck it up and deal with it” No, I’m not doing it! You have told me that most of my life. You do that. And the constant pressure of you and my life at school is screwing me up! So next time you want to get on me for something literally stupid like sitting on the floor to play a game or so I can watch Tv I’m just going to look at you and not say anything. And I will argue with you if it comes to it. Like seriously, who or what am I hurting just sitting wherever? If you try to take something out on one of us over something stupid I and Abby will back each other up. Along with Mom and Mark. then remember when I got hit in the chest with a softball? “Shake it off, you’ll be fine” YOU DON” T KNOW WHAT THAT EVEN FELT LIKE! THEN THE COACH BLAMED MY BEST FRIEND, FOR HURTING ME! IT WASN’T EVEN HER FAULT! Then, every game you came to, you sat in the front row knowing I wasn’t going to go out in the field because nothing happens. Talk about being a disappointment. You don’t even know what I would’ve said to you that day of practice that I got hit. I would’ve said a lot of things if I had the courage to do it. And then YOU made me run laps after every time I threw it over the coach’s head! I WAS SO TIRED THAT I DID” T WANT TO PRACTISE ANYMORE! THE FACT THAT YOU DID THAT WAS SO YOU! YOU DIDN’T CARE IF I PASSED OUT FROM RUNNING! The only reason you’re “excited” is so you can see me in pain, you never actually cared about what happened to me. And that day of practice proved it. ( Also, both me and Abby have said things in this letter, I’m sure you can figure out who said what.)
Sean_75 @raindrops_moon
That’s really a long way to read and maybe some of them I couldn’t understand much O.Ò; I really hope this situation can get better and yea ÓvÒ
Makayla @teenagechild14
TvT
sorry
Sean_75 @raindrops_moon
It’s ok :) I hope you’re fine ^^
Makayla @teenagechild14
I’m at school right now. Which is good I guess.
Sean_75 @raindrops_moon
Yea :D
Makayla @teenagechild14
But it’s filled with mean people-
I don’t really have to deal with them during my 6-7th hour classes.
Sean_75 @raindrops_moon
I see… ;-;
Makayla @teenagechild14
yea-
