My boyfriend cheated on me 4 times and told me long after that because he says he was scared he’ll lose me. He says he wasn’t gonna confess because he thought he would lose me but then he thought it would be better to hear about it from him rather than from somewhere else. Now he regrets having cheated at all. He says he loves me alot and I can see the genuinity in his eyes and he is doing everything I ask him to do to make me feel better. I too love him alot. I want to give him a second chance but I can’t seem to get off the image of him with other girls from my mind.
I literally logged on to talk about almost the exact same thing. Mine didn’t confess, one of his hook up’s called while he was in the shower, and I ended up getting to know. He’s sorry, I know he is, but I don’t know how to deal with it. I’ve broken up with him, but I can’t seem to let go of him. I still ask him to come over for a walk or text him through the day. It’s like I don’t know how to go back to a life without him. I can’t stop picturing those girls in his bed when I’m with him though, so I know its toxic for me. I get how hard it is to let go, but what I’m doing is slowly veining him off. Also I decided to start therapy, so I have another outlet to talk about everything, because up until this weekend, that used to be to him. Try not to judge yourself for whatever you decide, you do whatever you need in the moment. I’m telling myself the same thing. Being emotional doesn’t make us weak.
Four times is not a mistake hun, its a way of checking how many can he get away with. Whether you decide to forgive him or not, thats your call. However, you definitely should take some time off and reflect on how this makes you feel. Now is not the time to be concerned about how sorry he is but on yourself and any emotions you have yet to go through. Sometimes we refuse to see what others see and i believe thats what is happening. You so badly want to see the good in him that you dont even see how messed up this situation is. Any girl reading this would give to the same advice. Distance yourself. Dont feed into somebody’s insecurity of being abandoned. You are not his mother. You are not his side chick too. Introspect on this. You matter too.:)
a thing done once is a mistake but when it is repeated it is a plan or a habit
first off, im sorry you had to go thru that . secondly, the fact that his sole motivation for confessing to his sins was the fear of you finding about it from someone else speaks volumes.