Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts

share your deepest feelings and emotions in a safe and supportive environment.

โš•๏ธDepression

๐Ÿง‘Anxiety

๐Ÿ˜ฐStress

๐Ÿ’—Relationships

Create Thought

โ€บRelationshipsโ€บThought

Bhavya Bhatia @bhavyabhati...

Most of my life, Iโ€™ve been in relationships. I was in a longass serious one in school, and then a couple of others in college. Earlier, I used to idolize the notion of relationships and make them the be all and end all of all pursuits. I used to believe that despite whatever fuckup may happen in your life, if you have that one person whoโ€™ll make you feel like you arenโ€™t alone in that fight, whoโ€™ll hear you out or is just there for you, youโ€™ll be alright. But slowly I started attaching it value. I started making relationships a validation exercise, and that keeping them means keeping your self worth. So slowly it started turning into oh so what if I had a bad day, atleast I got her. That started making matters worse, as in the absence of relationships, I would be low on self esteem and derive no true meaning in my life. This, coupled with other self esteem issues about how I perceived myself would often make me feel like a failure in totality, and the absence of someone truly there to listen to you would compound the issue. I got stuck in an abyss. Recently, however, after a breakup, I realized two important things. A. The hurt in a relationship anyway isnโ€™t really worth the whole charade, you know? Itโ€™s kind of a painful exercise. B. My insecurities and my self esteem doesnโ€™t need to hinge on one person. That kind of dependency isnโ€™t healthy, and I donโ€™t need to constantly worry about not being good enough etc because I fucking am. I realized soon enough that relationships need to be there despite you believing youโ€™re awesome, not because you want to be made to feel that way. I started focusing on other things and now the conditioning I had of always wanting someone has dissipated. I donโ€™t keep thinking about my exes or shit, and Iโ€™ve grown emotionally. Ofcourse, I would still want to be with someone Iโ€™m compatible with, but that doesnโ€™t mean that I canโ€™t be happy till the point I donโ€™t find them.

2 replies

Avni @avni

โ€ข

I am really glad you took the time out to work through your own triggers and gain insight. This is truly uplifting to read.

@lostinthisworld
โ€ข

reading this is even helping me realize how much it takes of a person for you to be in a healthy relationship , sometimes you cant be with anyone else because you cant even love yourself and with no self love you have nothing to offer to your partner. always me and me first

user_group_img

8654 users have benefited
from FREE CHAT last month

Start Free Chat
start_free_chat_cta_image

Need Help? Call Us