Met my old friend today. In a random conversation she said, "When we put so much efforts into getting to know someone, or love someone, we should not let them go so easily. Weβre humans and we should act like one, otherwise it just makes us emotionless piece of flesh.β It sent me to a deep thought, When should we give up on a relationship? I have a very good friend who barely initiates conversation with me these days so I stopped texting him all together. Weβve been friends for 3 years and now itβs tough for me to pretend like I donβt care because I feel like I should just let him go. Am I doing the right thing by letting him go? Or shall I try to put in efforts and work on our friendship,making an attempt to make him stay? Is it my ego coming in between or self-respect?
Iβm in the exact same situation. I want to know the answer to this as well
Anand @lucifermstar
Itβs your self respect. Efforts should be there from both side, even little ones. Somewhere when we group up things change but the bond should remain the same.
Anand @lucifermstar
Grow up*
If there is something going on his life then you should understand but if not then itβs just you making efforts.
When you text him, conversation is long or short?
But do you think we should have that conversation with the other person once about how it drifts us apart?
Because I feel it makes both people in the conversation extremely uncomfortable, especially if you arenβt dating and donβt share the same pronoun.
However, I also wonder, is it actually right to let people go without making an effort to have them stay?
Also, when do we know that βThis is the most I could have doneβ?
Usually long. However he never told me about something going on in his life. He said texting me just didnβt occur to him
Anand @lucifermstar
Yes you should, you should let him know how you feel even if it makes both you uncomfortable because thatβs important.
You are giving efforts, every time you are messaging that person.
Anand @lucifermstar
Thatβs the question you have to ask yourself. To be honest, itβs the point where you have tried every possibility and your efforts are still in vain.
Honestly, Once I had a fleeting conversation where I mentioned that I feel like Iβm forcing conversations onto him and he said he was sorry to make me feel that way and it was just that he didnβt want to interact with anyone for sometime n stuffβ¦
We talked quite normally after that, however now weβre back on the same page
Iβm not sure if itβs a good idea having these conversations more than once. Thereβs a very thin line between being caring and pushy. I really donβt wanna cross it and be the later.
Anand @lucifermstar
Frankly, then itβs matter of priority. If messaging you doesnβt come to his mind then his priorities are different than yours.
One the possibility, he has taken you for granted.
Youβre right, we always risk being taken for granted by everyone we expressly care about ig. Thank you so much for having this conversation with me tho! Helped me feel light
Anand @lucifermstar
You just described my best friend, but this is the very thing I am too frustrated about.
See everyone makes efforts in their own way, for example if you know a person will not do this but he still does that for you just for you then you should understand that their way of expressing is different and if not then you are just wasting your efforts.
Anand @lucifermstar
No problem, you take care. Ciao :)