just wanted to share some thoughts. 
time flows through me like water in a stream. I am one with time yet not related at all. as fluid as the air around you, I move through time with ease. the ease has come naturally and at times I wish it would stop. the days tick by and I grow restless. maybe one day I will wake up and this was all a dream. 

Time

I have been stress eating due to divorce and people around me taunting for my decision all the time. I realized that I put my health inline during this. I started working out from last year and went through some skin issues and had to take medication. I put on weight due to that. I moved back to a diet where it helps with weightloss and keeps me fit. I eat 5 times a day where 2 times is fruits. I have been insecure with my weight due to my mom's continous comments. Lately my dad started doing that. He says, I thought you are on diet. Why do you keep on eating all the time. I think you are eating more than earlier. He says that it's a joke. When I confront him on the same, he says I eat a lot and react a lot. I don't think bodyshaming is a joke. Especially from your parents. 

Body image

Are their any women to talk to

Compassion

Never date someone in your friends group neverrrrrrrrrrr . 

Relationships

so i was at a park today with my friend.there were 2 guys we thought looked good and they were sitting on swings far from us.later they were taking walks around the park and when they passed by us my friend,she suddenly start talking loudly,and insulting me for no reason.she called me a lesbo for no reason and went back to normal once they passed .i was so shocked and weirded out by her like how can someone act so dumb and immature and insult someone just because you want to look good in front of some random guys?🤦🏻‍♀️.like you need to grow up for once.
Also context to a diff situation 2months ago - i met a guy a guy but we weren't talking and these friends of mine kept asking me to stay away from him since he is a red flag.so eventually i got over him and moved on .now today this friend at the park told me she suddenly likes him.DUDE I'm like 2 months ago you yourself gaslighted me ,warned me he's a Playboy ,red flag and now you like that same guy...?what is wrong with her.  i haven't told her i still lowkey like him but i don't even want to at this point in just so disappointed in her rn
The worst is back then they judged this dude only from his looks he looked like a Playboy but they kept annoying me sm with it i eventually just stopped telling them i like him or something but that's a story for another time...



Friends

What's your point of view regarding rape in society? 
Should be prevent it by making girls to stay at home during night or everytime.. and let them out when its necessary. 
Shouldn't we trust on friends with whom we are? 
Kuki society th change hone wale hi ni h? 
Do you have any solution other then making girls stay at home? 
Is it only the mistake of a girl who trusted another person..? 

Note: 
I am just putting my questions or views.. there is no intention to harm anyone's sentiment. So kindly   share your views. 

Adulting

Dukh hi toh seedhi hai.
Jispe tumko pair rakhkar upar chalna hai.

Dukh se bhaagne se kya haasil hona hai.
Use instagram ke reels se, overeating se drugs se cover karne se kya hoga.
Dukh toh khatam nhi hota, bas kuch der ke lie chup jaata hai, jo baad mein aur tandrust hokar aata hai.

Toh kosis karte hain ki, dukh ko samjhe

Kya kaise aur kyun ispe chintan karen♥️🌼

Stress

Yahan buhat positive or mature log hain advice k liye honestly i love y'all ✨

Now&Me Feedback

Life's lost all colors. 

We met a few months before covid hit the world. There was some serious tension between us, the good kind. It was exciting. We both felt it but we both ignored it, or tried to. 

She was beautiful. But she had something lurking in the shadows. Something she kept hidden from me. I didn't quite know what, but there was something. 

Things built up, we started talking, texting all night, and things were really speeding up. That's when one day, I realised she already was in a relationship. I wondered why she led me on. Maybe she didn't and it all was in my mind, I thought. But as it turns out, she definitely did. 

She had a certain quality about her. She was a tad disrespectful towards me. One day, when i just couldn't take her bullshit, I confronted her about it and I cut her out of my life. I never even looked at her, forget speaking to her. That went on for months. She kinda learned her lesson. But she never did apologize. 

Covid hit, we went back home, different states. One day, she texted me again. The bond that was lost, rekindled. We started talking again. It was about the same time as when I came out of a casual relationship with someone else. We hit it off well. Really well. 

We began dating, a long distance relationship started. We spent days and nights texting and calling each other. We grew too close. Somewhere down the line I probably forgot why I once had cut her out of my life. 

It came back to hit me hard one day. She used to fight a lot, incessant bickering. I used to let it go because she was adorable, or maybe I was blinded by love. I was not respected in this relationship. I let her go away with a lot of things. 

She was a girl who had a rough childhood, her father passed away early. She was destroyed by her ex emotionally. I came into her life and gave her happiness, and put a smile on her face. 

Because she had a rough past, I was more accommodative of her negatives. I guess I did love her. 

But there's a limit to everything. Just when things start to go well, she used to do something that hurt me. Fights always sparked no matter how well things went. 

It was an anniversary. I sent her a thoughtful gift, a handwritten note and played her a song. She was happy. 

But out of the blue, things went bad, I honestly don't even know what the reason was this time. I did not speak to her for a month. One day I realised she resigned from the office we worked at together, and I had no clue. I asked her, and she said "I didn't think you'd care to know". 

That's when I knew things are not right here. I decided to end the relationship forever. It hurt me bad that she continued to keep things hidden from me. I couldn't trust her anymore. 

Here I am today, in tatters. Life once had colors, and then a toxic relationship happened.

Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts