Just saw me and my ex's  pic....he was kissing me in  that. It's been a month of our breakup and I miss him. So bad. I try to distract mind. My life is going on but I miss him.

And there's my EX... Laying in front of TV, eating chips...watching kdrama... 

Breakup

 “Wear the white coat with dignity and pride—it is an honor and privilege to get to serve the public as a physician.”

Crush

Idk why is this funny but in delhi functions "dhol jageero da" song is lit😂. Has anyone heard this?

3am Thoughts

thought this platform was real ..but it's just lowkey tinder for depressed lads and gals ... So let me just jump into the thirst bandwagon and say .. 'hiiiiiiii' *sighs in bengali poetry*

Relationships

Hii :) 

Friends

How does soya chaap tastes like?? 

Hi, so I am new to this place and I am still a bit confused about how it works but I think I do need some help with something that I recently came to realise. Today my mother came to my room and as we were talking she got a little closer. I was feeling uncomfortable but I just stepped away as I usually do. And then she asked me why. But I've never thought about that. I just usually avoid being close to people. And it's cause I always thought I was gross, smelled bad, I just think I am generally unatractive to people. I am a part of a dancing group and when I was younger there were older people that used to bully me. Whenever somebody from their group of friends had to be next to me, they always laughed at each other, looking at me with disgust,  they would say that I smell bad, that I am ugly and laugh with eachother at me. They were the typical popular kids, I was a few years younger and as I am in a highschool related to math and I compete in this field, my reputation is that I am a loser, a nerd. But I do dislike their kind of behavior so I never had the urge to try and fit in just to be liked by people that I dislike myself. I still dance to this day, but some of this people are no longer a part of this group. And as I've grown up, they stopped bullying me like before. I've found my group of friends, I feel more confident, or so I thought. I am extremely self-conscious of the way i smell, the way I look, I always bring my parfume with me, I always have some gum on me, I avoid being close to people. I wouldn't say I am fat, but I guess I am a bit chubby, I am 1.75 and around 73kg, like I am not overweight but I feel so big, especially in comparisson to the girls around my age. I am almost 18 now but I haven't been in a relationship, nor have I kissed anybody. I've liked some boys but I've never felt comfortable. I just can't imagine how someone can be that close to you. Even when somebody leans closer to me when we are doing something together, I always try to keep my distance, as I am afraid, that I smell bad or that they would see how ugly I am. Even with my close friends I struggle to allow them close to me, just like hugging eachother, sitting close to one another. I find it very scary. It's been hard for me to find friends because I'm always afraid of letting them close to me and It's very hard to relax around people. I've been wearing glasses for 6 years and whenever  I take them off, I feel like everybody is constantly staring at me and thinking how ugly I am. Even like standing near my classmates or like hugging when we see eachother. I feel good when I chose my outfit for the day but the moment I go out ,I feel disgusting, like I am so fat, ugly, gross. I don't want this to stop me from living my best life. I can see how I distance myself from people and I don't think that this way I'll ever be able to be in a relationship, or even have a real close friendship. I am ok with talikng but when it comes to being comfortable with eachother, I just can't. People have said that they generally like me, like I am not a confrontational person, I try to be as kind and helpful as possible. Just some of them thought that I disliked them because of how distanced I am. I don't know what to do. I want to fix this. I don't want to feel this way whenever I am in public. Can someone recommend me something, I really have no idea what to do with myself. The quarantine isn't helping, I've put on some weight but this is nothing in comparisson to the things people are going through and I fully support social distancing. I know that my problem isn't that important, especially in this situation. I just can't seem to calm myself and I really needed to find a place where I can share what's on my mind. My mom says that this is wrong, that she's never even thought that I smell bad, that this is not in my head. But I guess I need somebody else that is not related to me to calm me down. Of course no one can see me, I just wanted to get it out od my head ans perhaps find a way to controll this and with time to become more comfortable with letring people close to me. I wish you all a very nice and happy day. I am sorry, I wish you all the good in the world and that all tour family and close ones are safw, healthy and happy

Self Esteem

Yeah, my younger sister is diagnosed with cancer, and that too is the 4th stage, when doc s confirm it by saying there is no hope, I am certain a miracle will happen, and I never cried in front God like this, I want him to answer me, I want him to cure her,, only he can do it,, yeah!! But I feel numb whenever I witness her pain and suffering, I've totally lost my calm these days... Idk, I should be mentally strong right?? Yup I can do it right??? 

Dreams

All I ever wanted to do is to be successful in my school, college, and my career. But I can't stop comparing myself and I feel extremely stupid. I wish, for once, I think of myself to be capable and well-deserving and be a little more confident. 

Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts