Thought

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Anonymous

I’ve been doing so well professionally. I just can’t seem to get this sinking feeling out of my head. It’s like I have 2 good days where I’m motivated, but no matter how well the 3rd day goes I just end up crying and upset.

I went through a really hard break up a few months ago. As childish as it sounds it really has been hard for me.

I’ve been told I bottle up my emotions with my professional success. I’ve cried, I’ve been angry, I’ve felt vengeful, I’ve even felt better off sometimes. When will this feeling of being alone and not good enough for any real love in my life go away?

I just genuinely want to forget and be alright. This other person seems just fine. I have extreme days. Either I exercise and diet all day, or I work all day or I do absolutely nothing.

I had the best day today professionally. So much I did cake to life. So many people appreciated it. So many people saying good stuff to me but it’s just really hard to feel good right now.

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4 replies
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Anonymous

Hi there, I am so glad that you’re doing well professionally and that you have a purpose and passion in life. Really happy for you.
About the breakup, I’m really sorry that you had to go through such a tough situation. It used to happen with me too when I used to be completely okay for a day or so and then the cycle would repeat of me being sad and not being able to even get up from my bed. What genuinely helped me was my work, being distracted by my goals. Also, please give yourself time to heal and get through this pain that you feel. Sometimes all we need is time and patience to let the power that the other person have on us to go away! I AM SURE YOU’LL GET THROUGH THIS!

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Anonymous

Honestly I think my problem is that no matter what I do, however well I end up doing with work, I keep hoping he’ll see. And I keep hoping he’ll congratulate me or be proud of me but that’s never going to happen. No matter how well I do. It’s just really sad that I’ve been directing all of this towards him. I really just need to stop. I’m so emotionally unavailable sometimes I drive people away.

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Anonymous

Hey, don’t be so hard on yourself please. It’s okay if you still want him to see what you’re doing, it’s completely natural and happens to the best of us. Trust me it’s normal, it’s happened with me too and it will go away only with time. Very soon you’ll not want his validation anymore and it’ll be the best feeling ever. Please hold onto yourself and your work till then, I promise you it’ll be worth it!

@polkadot15

I’m so sorry to hear about your breakup. I went through this too when I broke off a 4 year relationship and just dug myself deep in my work as a distraction. I have to say from experience that while it’s good to be productive and find distractions, it’s also necessary to allow yourself to feel the pain and the hurt bc only then will you truly get through it. It gets easier every day

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