Is it worth it to stay with an emotionally unavailable person who isn’t just ready to make a single effort to make US work.
I feel so drained and exhausted everyday whenever I bring up the conversation about how m feeling in this relationship and I really don’t wanna give up so easily. It seems like he just can’t see things getting worse n has nothing to say or have a grown up conversation about it.
Fun part has always been nice n good from the start and we’ve been living together since 3 years. We’ve made such great memories together, been there for each other throughout. Faced career challenges, financial crises together.
We were in long distance recently for 2 months due to covid. During this time I’ve been through a lot of shit. Lost my job , didn’t get paid for my work and top of that staying with family for a long period of time almost after 5 years I realised how much I’ve grown apart from their conservative beliefs n everytime I try to talk it out with my mother or anyone it just lead to another chaos at home. All of this pushed me towards severe depression and anxiety, which I’ve been dealing with quite sometime before. Felt like fleeing away somewhere,may be back to my bf. I thought of all the people he would understand and will work together to come out of this phase.
But it isn’t same anymore…as much as I know what I want and deserve I’m feeling myself going away from him day by day, after every conversation (one-sided) somewhere I give up a little on him…even if I don’t want to.
He just stays quiet as hell when I try to make a conversation or say the least of things that I expect from him.
He isn’t ready to accept the fact that there’s always room for betterment in a person.
You can not just counter your partner with some baseless expectation(for ex- even I want a yoga routine or I wanted to start dieting you aren’t helping me either to cook nutritious food for me) P.S. I’ve been cooking for ourselves purely out of Love since start of our relationship for both of us alongwith taking care of almost everything he need n the house needs n the fact he never acknowledged what I gave to this relation is so disappointing.
Like for real, such audacity to say this to a person who is constantly struggling to get out of the bed and start her day,who’s feeling sick physically and mentally, lost appetite and what not…too little time to explain here in words.
Now that we are back together and both working from home.
About time I realised I’m the only one giving in this and no matter what I do,how much I care,how special I treat him. He just don’t see it n won’t try even.
He doesn’t even know what kinda coffee I like even after living together 24*7 for 3 years(made a cup of 3tsp sugar,milk n a pinch of coffee the other day for me).
It made me question myself why do I bother to cook the way he likes everything and not even appreciated for it.
I feel like I’m talking to someone who has no idea how to LISTEN and accept your flaws and work on it for good.
I feel sufocated n still hope to make this work.