Is it okay that you don’t remember everything that you were told to do, that you have to write down so that you dont miss out any point

Idk, i am on the same boat. Tell me too when you know the answer. 

I think it's okay. A bit careless but okay. 

In my case, i feel too much pressure not to make any mistakes which lead me to make mistakes and then i hate myself for that. When i write thing because i am not able to recall everything it makes me feel weak, like i am not able to remember even small things and then i criticise myself even more

Frustration

It's been 5 months... Your thoughts haunt me day and night. I thought I was over you. But turns out I'm not... I see signs... I feel your presence. You're so in me I can see you looking at me right now. Why are you here? What do you want from me? Are you thinking about me too? We used to say the same things at the same time. We used to be so in sync. So tell me... are you missing me too? Are you doing okay? I hope you're somewhere safe my love. But you hurt me. I shouldn't be missing you. You betrayed me. You were dishonest. You crushed my heart and stepped all over it. 
Universe... Heal me from this pain. I love him. I accept it. We weren't meant to be together. I accept it. Now please make this pain stop. I don't want to think about him. I don't want to be ruminating over this unrequited love. I have been nothing but nice and loving to everyone all my life. Why are you making me suffer? Please bring in some blessings. Liberate me from this heartbreak. Fill my life with love. I can't handle this hurt anymore. End my suffering.

Breakup

i missed you , i want to call you , i wanna hear your voice even tho  i know that it will get  painful after the call  end's  , i know that i will hate the fact that one day you used to be mine and now im nothing than a stragner in your way . you just need to get passed it and move on with your day  .

I wanted to tell you this and  i know this  will not mean anything to you , so maybe here someone else will .ik that i wont find comfort elsewhere and even if i went somewhere else i will be talking about you .  



3am Thoughts

mine was never a love at first night,
it took full five minutes of staring at her eyes...

One Sided Love

How do you stop yourself from loving someone when you know it'll never work out?

I know u r not going to call
No texts, nothing all along 
What if I get surprised someday
 
The days are just passing by
And the nights too are done being strong
What if u come and melt them into happiness

I am aware of u not being here
In ur life too,I don't belong 
What if we crosspaths on a random day

Was is that easy to forgot
Or was I never your love song
What if we overthink of each other at the same time 

My heart goes numb with every scream
Ur memories knock,the way u call me babes
What if someday u urself say ,"LOVE ,I AM HERE"

Neither i can  let u go
Nor i can  hold u to long
What if we meet each other again someday

Pretending like u still here
I never knew I was this much strong
What if I die without
Stealing ur last me 
Atleast once prove me wrong

I have something to say to you 
And of course this isn't going straight to your face 
I mean how can i still look you in the eye-- you've done so much shit to me i can even bear to look at your face
You were in my friend group and i thought of you as a friend 
Even though you tried to taser me i still thought of you as a friend 
I came out to you, you were supposed to be my friend 
I told you about my dad and how much it hurt me as a person and still you do this 
Dragging me into that bathroom, pushing me on my knees, on the floor, and against a wall 
and then kissed me after all you did while smiling at me crying 
You're my best friend's boyfriend 
After i told her about the time you forced my hand down your pants she told me "I should beat your ass right now"
I forgave her 
I wanted to tell her about what you did but when i brought you up she was so...happy 
She had a sparkle in her eyes and her face lit up 
I thought to myself "I can't tell her what he did. she'd be heartbroken. she'll think i'm a liar" 
Do you know what it's like to look into the eyes of your best friend and hesitate 
Because you know "even though i'm drowning in a pit of despair she's never gonna believe me or worse, she'll think i did set it up to make him look like a cheater. she's loves him too much" 
So I bit my tongue 
You probably never knows what it feels like 
How much it hurt me 
I go home to the same thing and i come home and it's you threatening to do it to me again
Do you know how terrifying that is 
you probably don't know that either 
GOD, I would never ever say this to your face because the thought of you terrifies me 
The feeling of you still hurts me 
I hope that you burn 
I hope that you burn in the deepest parts of hell 
I hope that burn in a vat of acid 
I hope that you get hurled off the largest building and land on spikes 
I hope that you get just as much pain as I felt 
So yeah, fuck you Keon  

Harassment

In another life, I wouldn’t want to meet you again. If we ever meet again in a different lifetime, I’d spend my life avoiding you. I wouldn’t want to feel this much pain ever again.

I may have been hurt before, but those people, when we connected, I always felt like something was off with them. With you, it was genuine. You noticed and remembered all the small details about me, even those I only mentioned in passing. It amazed me everytime you recalled. You truly cared even when I never thought you would. Your concern was real and genuine and I felt it.

With those other people, they’d make me believe that they had an emotional connection with me, although their actions didn’t match their words. You were the opposite. You always said that you didn’t really care that deeply for me, or so your words say. But, your actions always betrayed you. That was why it didn’t bother me that you weren’t saying it, because I could feel it, even when you were trying so hard not to show it.

It was a beautiful story to live, no matter how short. It was magical for me. But, now that it has to end as soon as it started, it hurts so deeply. We both knew it was a temporary high. We both knew we were doomed from the start, but we didn’t care. We went for it, and we were happy.

But, that story, no matter how beautiful, was just borrowed and was not meant to last. Our knowledge of its eventual end does nothing to cushion the pain when the end finally arrives. We both are hurt, but you are right that this is for the best. I cannot tell you goodbye, because I really want to stay, but then I am left with no other choice but to just stay away.

This love might have been magical, but the pain is also excruciating. I don’t want to ever feel this pain again, whether in this lifetime or in another. So, in another life, I wouldn’t want to meet you again. In another life, I wouldn’t even dare to talk to you. In another life, I’ll correct the mistake of ever entangling my life with yours. I wish you happiness in this lifetime and in another. But in another life, I wouldn’t want a do over. 💔

LETTERS I COULDN`T SEND TO THEM (PART1 )                                                               I dont know how but i love you and i hate you ,i need you and i`m better offf without you ,i miss you and i`m moving on ,i don`t know how to explain how all these thoughts are going on in my mind at the same time ,i don`t know if i want you back or not ,i don`t know what i`m missing ,i know it`s you but i don`t know if it`s your memories or you as a person ,it came as a shock to me when you left and i think i`m still in the denail stage cause from the very beggining you said you were never going anywhere ,you promised to stay forever and i believed you forgotting of the possibility  that they could be just empty words said by another new person to me .
I know you regret everything you did to me the last time we met and i could sense the guilt from your eyes while you could see the betrayal i felt from you through mine .I dont know if we`re good for each other or not but someone`s gotta know the answer right ? and since it was not me ,that means it must have been you and you left which means we weren`t good for each other ,then why do i think that maybe we could have been the gateaway to each others problems ,why did it hurt so much on saying goodbye that day ,why did we hug so tight that day like we were giving each other strenght for the oncoming vicious  days  ,why did it feel like we didn`t want each other to part ,like if it was in our hands we would run away ,from everything and everywhere in that one instant and just have each other ,and we both know we`ld be okay with just that ,with each other 
You`re that precious treasure those wise people advice to keep in your life for as long as possible hidden from the outside world cause you only find such people once and maybe i`m a fool to not have listened ,i was afraid to lose you ,i was insecure that you`ld find someone better and leave me ,i wanted to tell you how much you meant ,it only mattered to me what you thought of me ,i was jealous when you`ld name someone else a lot cause i thought soon i`ld be replaced by them ,i was scared that they would mean more to you than i mean to you , i was terefied of ever losing you cause you made me believe in myself and when you left i thought that maybe i really was nothing ,why did you had to make me the center of your life only to snatch that away from me and make me feel absolutely worthless and useless but still i wish sometimes that maybe it was more of the right person and wrong timing thing and someday we`ll meet again wwith the right timing and be the right people for each other 

I wish i could have told you all this the day we met for the last time ,i wish that we`ld meet again and i tell you this one day but till then i think i`ll just keep writing to remmember it for when the day comes 



Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts