Shashidhar @shashidhar117
Hey!!! Yes i am here to listen. Talk to me
I am in a relationship with a guy since a year…who has actually my best friend and another point is that he is having a drastic past with two people…he suffered a lot…so he understands me a lot…
In lockdown we were actually habituated to long distance…but in this October I actually found that he is in touch with his “ex” and he being hiding it from me…but later he noticed that I am the one who is important to him and he cleared it with her… but now she is being like holding him…I am not able to digest it… actually she cheated on him…she left him…and now she wants him back…for this she is being contacting him… This was one side…on the other hand due to some family issues he is gona leave city for a while… and now I am mentally disturbed for work pressure and other health issues…so now when I need him…he is not available…
Today I bursted out to him…he says that am not understanding his position…because he is being busy due to family issues and not even able to take rest…
I compromised…but the thing hurt me is the words he told me…that “Thanks for not understanding me” and “Am sorry for not reaching your expectations”
Did I really not understand him…
and I feel like I am disturbing him…
Please suggest me on what I can do…
And now I actually want to take a leave for few days…and want to set myself and try not to depend on him…Now the problem is I will not be able to get leave😔😔
Shashidhar @shashidhar117
Its good you pour your heart here…
Understanding your situation i can say that more than you your bf is in confused and stressed state.
Best thing you can do is distract yourself for now, i know its hard to distract from someone with whom you are connected 24/7 but please take deep breath. Start doing things which keeps you calm, go for walk , workout , cooking keep yourself busy and let the time soak in .
If your bf really wants you he will come to you for sure , please dont beg anyone for their care and love.
Due to work from home and all your health will take toll please take care of it first…
dont drain your energy for someone who is not understanding you.
Thank you for your reply…but the thing is I have tried so many times…like before entering into such relationship, during lockdown…but I don’t know why am I clinging to him…I tried to read some books…started talking to myself…trying to appreciate myself…actually loving myself… and even then at the end of the day…at some point I was going back to him… For this I actually got out from social media, trying to stop using my mobile…so that I will not contact him… and for distracting I started watching some web series…but it is not working out…Moreover I have started taking my career seriously … but at the end of the day…I am just saying about my day to him and expecting a reply from him…
What else I can do…to get this over…
Shashidhar @shashidhar117
Really glad you have been trying all these stuff, you can reach out to close friends or family without whom you can talk and share laugh and stuff
Trust me it works.
Atlast if you dont have any, you can ping me to talk or share your feelings
Thank You soo much…😀
Shashidhar @shashidhar117
Welcome 😃 happy to put smile on people’s face
Samuel_Karuthi @sunny97
Always
Janmesh @janmesh
yes buddy! i’m all ears:)
Simran @st1199
Hi!
Sup?
Hi whatsup :)
Yess… go ahead friend
In my opinion neither of you are wrong in this situation… as both of you are busy in work at different timings it might get difficult to connect. Also, just cuz he said somethings does not mean he would want you to not contact him atall now… I’m sure you aldo must have said somethings in frustrations… if you guys really love each other fights dnt brk you… you can alwz apologize and say i might not have understood ur situstion as i was also stressed and just wanted to talk to you.
I understand it… thanks a lot…it makes me feel better
Also, both are facing some tough times and are under stress…it does become difficult to console the other person as you own mind is nt clear… maybe you could message and say that you have also been feeling stressed and you would like to talk to him abt it when he is free… i noe this might sound professional but we can’t alwz expect the other person to be able at all times.
I will try it…
