Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts

Is a Silent break up bad or good? Because his a horrible communicator.u

Backstory- I been in a emotional abuse relationship I been Manipulated by him more then I can count, I been gaslighted by him, also to mention I been made feel Guilty for trying to cut the relationship off he would start to make me feel sorry for him and making up excuses for me to change my mind and I’m so dumb for just keep letting it happen. Since we dated I couldn’t remember one happy memories together with him, how sad is that? All I could remember is all the bad shit he did to me, I learned that this wasn’t a relationship this is Domestic Violent relationship and it’s so toxic, so toxic I started Abandoning myself and my values and I don’t feel like myself, it’s like the light in my eyes just switched off, before he met me I was a woman full of life and so Independent and switch on with life I had everything I needed to enjoy my life, till I met him and my life turn upside down. To also mention I have done everything for this person but yet he treats me like shit and clams he loves me and that I am his love of his life, he disrespected Multiple times makes me feel like my feelings are negative and that I am always complaining and that I am so sensitive, he makes me feel like I am not allow to be human, that everything I talk about is negative and he doesn’t wanna talk about it, Because of the emotional abuse and the relationship stresses me out too much I just can’t handle it anymore and I want to leave the relationship for good, reason why I chose silent break up because-

1. He won’t agree with me when I say I wanna break up and he turns around Manipulate me that I should feel bad about it.

2. he would say all kind of nasty things about me and how he would go find another girl

3. He takes everything a joke when I call him out for being so disrespectful to me— he would say something that clearly bother me and he goes…I’m joking but this happens every single time.

4. We fight way too much.

5. I no longer love him or have any interest in the relationship going on. I don’t trust him.

I’m not excited to speak to him or even spending time with him or even see him anymore. Last I saw him he said some horrible things to me when I spent the night at his house and he said we breaking up and I was so happy about it, does that make me a bad person for feeling so happy that he broke up with me? Then turns around and try to be sweet to me, I’m pretty sure this guy needs to go work on himself cause his actual Delusional, and his so weird me out that I get the ick from being around him, when I left his home on my drive back to my home I felt like I was finally breathing again because I felt at that moment on I decided I am choosing me first, I Decided to lose any sort of contact with him and it has been 5 days so far. The relationship was doomed from the start but I blame myself for Ignoring that and now all I can do is heal and learn to grow from it because I have no more to give to this man child anymore so I am choosing to do a silent break up where I walk away Quietly because even tho he was the one that broke up with me as a joke but I’m not laughing I took that on as that’s enough Trauma for me.

Also if I did break up with him he wouldn’t allow it and that made me feel stuck so by leaving quietly without a word seem Easier then sitting there and get abuse I mean nothing will get to his head about anything till he realise that he completely lost a good woman.

Ps. We are currently in a court case for Domestic violence.