I'm tired, I'm holding my tears cause I don't have any friends so that I can share my problems:<

Lonely

Why shouldn't I end my life?

Suicidal Ideation

Corona made me two years older without any growth in life😒

Career

She is my personal brand of heroin.

3am Thoughts

Sooo I have this so called best friend of mine, we've known each other for 5years now and we became really close 4 years ago. 
So thing was that she was part of a popular group which was very toxic and I was her non toxic private friend. We always hung out a lot but no one really knew that we were bffs. I was okay with it back then, I was understanding. 
However now, we're both in the same college and things look like they're the same but it's changed. She treats me like a bff when we're in private. But in front of everyone someone else (my other friend is her bff) no one really knows how close we are/how we used to be. Worst is that now she only contacts me when she needs help with studies. Everyone knows how the bond with your bff is like. She never treats me like a bff but still calls me one. She never shares her feelings, thoughts secrets. I always find out abt it through a 3rd person. Hell she didn't even tell me she got a tattoo which is like a pretty big thing here. I hate it, what is it that I don't have to become her bff. I don't expect much from her, I don't expect us to hang out all the time. But just casual convos?sharing your feelings? Is it too much to ask for? 

Insecurity

hey
It's always been hard for me to stay up in my house, they abuse me emotionally and make me feel that I'm good for nothing, and internally make me feel sad. They think teasing me will make me even more strong but I weaken every minute, my parents insulted me near everyone in my layout to make me feel embarrassed and told me that I blackmail them by cutting my hand, and tried hitting me cause I was regretting it. The reason behind that was, that I wanted to die, but I didn't have any guts. This is how they treat me, and my mom told me that I'm a completely different child, they all try to compare me to others and tell me that I'm a loser. I don't wanna live this way help me out :(

Depression

My anxiety and anti social suff is getting worse I can't handle it everything even small things are hard I'm always wishing things could go back to being simple and boring idc this is numb cold and alone 

I want to ask what you should do when an ex repeatedly comes back into your life just to tell you how the end of the relationship was your fault. I have been vulnerable in front of him all along and always admitted that yes it was my fault. This time I fought back but not that freely. He brought up a lot of things from the past and again blamed it all on me, then without even listening to my points, blocked me from everywhere saying he can't do this anymore. Now Ik he does that to clear his own conscience but half of the things he said weren't even true, he comes to call me toxic while the reasons he gives are not justified. And now after a day of this argument I realise I should have brought up certain points too. Which were very very solid. How should I proceed now. It's only been 2 months since the breakup and even though it was really messy and full of misunderstandings, I was starting to move on. I really have this urge to reach him somehow and say all of this to him, how he is so fcking wrong and what his faults are but my mind also tells me to just let this go now. What should I do..


Breakup

I literally feel like that my life is a complete mess right now. I don't know what to do.I wanna work on myself but don't how to start. I wanna put my life together and bring the old me back

Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts